Help! My baby won’t take a bottle!
Is your breastfed baby refusing bottles? Don’t panic! Dive into some reasons a nursing baby rejects the bottle and some tips to remedy bottle-feeding aversion.
Originally published on June 24, 2019; Revised August 27, 2024
Author: Robin Kaplan, M.Ed, IBCLC, FNC
Photo by Brytny.com on Unsplash
So your breastfed baby is refusing bottles. Isn’t the typical concern that a breastfeeding/chestfeeding baby may prefer bottles over nursing and not the other way around? While breastfeeding refusal can happen as well, any type of feeding rejection is your baby’s way of communicating that something is feeling challenging. So let’s dive into some of the reasons why a nursing baby rejects the bottle and some tips to remedy a bottle feeding aversion.
ABOUT SDBFC
The San Diego Breastfeeding Center was established in 2009 by Robin Kaplan, International Board Certified Lactation Consultant, Functional Nutritionist, and parent. Her vision was to create a judgment-free, inclusive support system for families navigating infant feeding challenges.
SDBFC offers a wide range of one-on-one breastfeeding, infant feeding, and nutrition consultations - as well as classes, support groups, online articles, and social media - making it your one-stop-shop for all things infant feeding!
Why do babies refuse to take bottles?
your Baby lost their innate sucking reflex
All babies are born with an innate sucking reflex. This is the reflex that causes them to start suckling as soon as something (nipple, finger, bottle, pacifier) is placed in their mouth. Well, that innate sucking reflex at some point becomes integrated, usually between 8-12 weeks old, making it such that the baby now decides whether he/she wants to suck, rather than relying on the reflex. And if your baby hasn’t practiced bottle feeding before the reflex is integrated, they might have no interest in trying out this new feeding skill.
Tips to overcome bottle rejection with an older baby:
Try offering when your baby is sleepy - this is when the innate sucking reflex comes back temporarily!
Change the temperature - maybe warming the milk will be more enticing
Try some distraction techniques - face your baby away from you, try lying your baby on their side, bounce on a yoga ball, go outside for a distraction, have an older sibling show the baby a toy or book
Offer your baby just the bottle nipple (no milk in the bottle), after nursing. Think of this as playful practice, which removes the stress and keeps this low pressure. Once you find a bottle nipple that your baby is willing to suck on without milk, then offer the bottle with milk the next time around.
Your baby doesn’t like that particular bottle nipple or flow
Bottle nipples come in many different shapes, sizes, and flow rates. Don’t fall for the marketing hype when the bottle packaging says that it is ‘just like the breast.’ If your baby is struggling with the flow of milk coming out or cannot form a good seal around the bottle nipple, that is going to feel very frustrating to him/her and could cause bottle refusal of that particular bottle(s)
Tips to overcome bottle rejection when your baby doesn’t like the bottle nipple or flow:
Focus on what your baby does when you put the bottle into his/her mouth.
If his/her lips don’t form a great seal around the bottle nipple (milk spilling out of the sides of her/his mouth, lips curled under, etc), choose a different shaped nipple/bottle.
If he/she looks overwhelmed by the milk flow (eyes bugging out, hands splaying, etc), go with a slower flowing nipple or switch to a completely different bottle brand. And practice paced bottle feeding
If your baby is struggling to get milk out of the bottle, move up to a higher nipple size to see if that helps.
Pumped milk has excess lipase in it
Does your pumped milk smell soapy, metallic, or sour? Was your baby willing to take freshly pumped milk before he/she started rejecting the bottle? It’s possible that your milk might have excess lipase. Lipase is a natural enzyme that breaks down fats in pumped milk, making it easier for babies to digest. However, when lipase levels are too high, it can cause the fats in milk to break down faster, especially when stored in cool temperatures. This can change the taste and smell of the milk, making it less appealing to babies.
Tips for overcoming bottle rejection due to excess lipase:
First, you’ll want to figure out when your milk starts to become sour.
Next, you can scald your milk to deactivate the lipase, stopping it from souring your milk.
Then, you will want to practice with the bottle nipple (like in the recommendations above) to demonstrate to your baby that bottle nipple doesn’t equal sour milk flavor.
Once your baby is willing to practice with the bottle nipple (without milk in it) then offer a bottle with non-sour milk.
Your baby has a tongue tie, upper lip tie, or high palate
Variations in oral anatomy can sometimes make bottle feeding challenging. Some tongue ties restrict the way a baby extends or wraps his/her tongue around a firm bottle nipple, making it more difficult to extract milk from the bottle. Some upper lip ties restrict the way a baby’s upper lip flanges, making it more difficult to form a good seal around a bottle nipple. Some high palates are very sensitive, causing a baby to gag when a long bottle nipple touches that particular spot at the roof of the mouth.
Tips for overcoming bottle rejection due to a tongue tie, upper lip tie, or high palate:
Work with a lactation consultant to identify which bottle might be most comfortable and effective for your baby, based on his/her oral anatomy, while protecting your nursing relationship.
Work with a lactation consultant to evaluate whether a tongue and/or upper lip tie release would be helpful for bottle feeding (as well as continued breastfeeding and solid food feeding).
Work with an Occupational Therapist or SLP who specializes in alternative bottle feeding methods for babies
If you’ve tried a few of these tricks and your baby is still refusing the bottle, STOP! It’s important to not force the issue or it could become very difficult to resolve. Your baby is trying to communicate that it is time to bring in a lactation consultant who has extra training in bottle refusal (like all of the lactation consultants at SDBFC!)
If your baby is refusing a bottle, we are just a consult away!
Don’t let bottle feeding struggles cause stress for you or your baby! Our consultants can help identify the root cause(s) of why your baby isn’t taking a bottle and can offer suggestions for ways to overcome these challenges! At each bottle feeding appointment, our lactation consultants complete a full oral assessment, try a variety of bottle nipples, and offer strategies for helping your baby build bottle feeding skills. Book a one-on-one bottle feeding consultation today
SDBFC is committed to providing high-quality lactation and functional nutrition consultations to parents in San Diego and beyond. Explore our postpartum, prenatal, and functional nutrition consultations, take a breastfeeding class or attend a workshop.
About the Author
Robin Kaplan has been an IBCLC since 2009, the same year that she opened up the San Diego Breastfeeding Center. Robin was the founding host of the Boob Group podcast and published her first book, Latch: a Handbook for Breastfeeding with Confidence at Every Stage in 2018. Melding her passions for supporting lactating parents and holistic health, Robin finished her Functional Nutrition Certification in 2023. In her free time, she enjoys hanging out with her two teenage boys, hiking, traveling, weaving, cooking, and searching for the best chai latte.
Related Posts
I'm Told that my Breastfed Baby Needs to be Supplemented.... What Should I Do?
Being told that your breastfed baby needs to be supplemented can feel extremely overwhelming and can often feel like quite a blow to the self-esteem. You might be concerned about your milk supply and if your baby will prefer the bottle to your breast. You may feel confused as to why your baby isn’t gaining the appropriate amount of weight while breastfeeding.
So, let’s talk about the reasons why a baby might need to be supplemented and how to do this without sabotaging your milk supply and your breastfeeding relationship.
What is a supplement?
A supplement is anything in addition to what your baby receives from your breast while breastfeeding. Babies can be supplemented with:
Mom’s own pumped milk (if baby is not removing her milk well enough)
Donor milk (from a milk bank or from another breastfeeding/pumping parent)
Formula
How do I know if my baby truly needs supplemental feedings?
Babies are expected to gain a certain amount of weight based on their age. So, if a baby is NOT gaining that expected amount, additional supplementation is often recommended. Here are the weight gain expectations for the first year of baby’s life:
Initial weight loss in the first few days of life - no more than 10% of baby’s birth weight
2 weeks - baby should be back to birth weight (or very close, if he/she lost more than 10% in the first 2 weeks
2 weeks - 4 months - baby should gain about 7 ounces per week
4 months - 6 months - baby should gain about 4-5 ounces per week
6 months - 1 year - baby should gain about 2-4 ounces per week
Why might a baby need to be supplemented?
There are many common reasons why a baby might need supplemental feedings.
Some common medical issues that can arise shortly after birth that may lead to supplements are prematurity, low birth weight, poor feeding, low blood sugar levels (hypoglycemia), elevated bilirubin levels (jaundice), dehydration, excessive weight loss or poor weight gain. After those first few weeks, some common reasons for supplementation are baby not removing milk well while breastfeeding (due to tongue tie, reflux, very long feeding sessions) and a low milk supply. In all of these cases, the first step is to ensure that baby is breastfeeding effectively. Next we want to assess mom’s milk supply to make sure that she is producing enough milk for her baby. Sometimes all it takes are a few modifications to the baby’s feeding routine to help baby start to gain weight. Other times it requires a lactation consultation (done by an IBCLC) to assess baby’s feeding and mom’s milk supply for the cause for baby’s low weight gain.
What if I can't express enough milk for my baby?
First you’ll want to make sure that you have everything you need to express your milk. If using an electric pump, make sure the pump flanges fit correctly and that you are pumping for about 15 minutes after breastfeeding. Some moms let down for the pump easily. Others find that they prefer a hand pump or hand expression. You will want to find what works best for you.
In those first few days after birth (when milk production has not quite yet surged), it can be a bit challenging to express a measurable amount of milk. In this case, sometimes baby might need to be supplemented by donor milk or formula.
Once your mature milk is in (after those first few days), you might want to meet with an IBCLC to put together a breastfeeding/pumping plan to see if you are able to express enough milk for your baby, as well as increase your milk supply, if necessary. If you are not yet able to express enough milk for your baby’s supplemental feedings, donor milk or formula would be recommended.
Do I have to use a bottle when giving my baby supplemental feedings?
Not at all! There are several ways to supplement a baby. Each way has its pros/cons and will be determined by what works best for you and your baby.
Cup feeding is great for older babies, as well as some younger babies who will not take a bottle
Finger feeding is great for the first few weeks of life, as the flow is slow and your finger can help organize your baby’s sucking rhythm.
Supplemental nursing systems (SNS) allow your baby to be supplemented at the breast so that he/she still thinks everything is coming from you! The SNS has a tube that slips into your baby’s mouth, at the breast, to provide the supplement at the same time baby is breastfeeding. This works best when baby is latching/breastfeeding well and mom is trying to increase her milk supply.
Bottles are definitely an option, as well. You will want to offer a bottle in a baby-led (paced) manner so that your baby doesn’t begin to prefer the ease and flow of the bottle, compared to your breast.
Will my baby ever be able to fully breastfeed after supplements?
Generally, the answer to this is YES! Most reasons for supplementation are short-term problems that are resolved relatively quickly with good treatment. Premature babies grow and get stronger, and typically get better at breastfeeding around their due dates or shortly after. A baby who is having difficulty with breastfeeding immediately after birth will often be ready for breastfeeding within a few days after birth. If breastfeeding challenges linger for more than a few days, an IBCLC can help identify the reasons and set you on a path for reducing and hopefully eliminating supplementation as soon as possible. In the meantime, expressing your milk in addition to breastfeeding will help maintain and build your milk supply as challenges resolve.
When can I stop supplementing?
Part 2 will discuss how you’ll know it's time to wean from supplements and helpful tips for doing so.
For more information about supplementation reasons, methods, and choices, check out these The Boob Group podcast episodes:
Exclusive Breastfeeding and Early Supplementation
Breastfeeding the Jaundiced Baby
When Breastfeeding Doesn’t Go As Planned
Help a Mama Out: What to Do When Your Baby Refuses a Bottle
What tricks have worked for you when your breastfed baby refused a bottle?
Michelle La Plante: Bottle boot camp with daddy! I left the apartment for the day, leaving baby and daddy there with plenty of expressed breastmilk and a bottle. By the end of the day, they had figured it out. (Kudos to hubby for this – it was tough on him to see her cry and fuss…. But, then again, his breasts didn’t leak at the sound of the baby crying!)
Amanda Garfinkel Young: Early and often worked well with my second. With my first, the nanny had a good trick. She held him facing out, looking out the window and fed him with the bottle in the other hand. A little awkward, but it seemed to distract him from the fact that he wasn’t looking up at mama while eating.
Danielle Smith: Try lots of different bottles.
Stephanie Lorenzen: After trying a number of different bottles, we used a spoon and a shot glass. We then moved on to a straw cup after 4 months of age.
Julie Chapin: As a nanny, I went through this. Had to have mama away at first. Plus, baby had to be laying or sitting out of arms… could not resemble nursing at all. First successes were warm bottle given in a drowsy state as baby was waking in her bassinet. Windows and toys distracting baby at other times or in a bouncy chair. Had to use droppers and spoon feeding with a few babies leading up to the bottle.
Natalie Quebodeaux Cavender: Sippy cup! Turns out he hated the warmed milk and not the bottle. He likes mama’s milk cold when not from the tap!!! LOL!
Jennie Bever: My first one took a straw cup fine. Second one reverse cycled. Now that he’s older, he’ll also take breastmilk warm in a straw cup. He would also drink out of a regular cup, although it’s a bit messier!
Liz Anderson Weaver: At daycare, we have had to resort to using medicine droppers with two babies. Then we tried ERERy NIPPLE EVER until we found their perfect bottle combo. Both suck ‘em down like champs now!
Stacey Singh: I read that if you have the person who is feeding your baby wear the robe or another article of clothing you wear frequently, it can really help. I had my husband try it and my baby actually did take a little from a bottle. We’re still working on it though.
Sylvia Padilla Sullivan: We tried different bottles. Because he is older (4.5mos), one with a pretty fast, easy flow worked better than the ones we had been trying (like when he was tiny and still learning to suck.)
Thanks to everyone who responded to our questions on our San Diego Breastfeeding Center and The Boob Group Facebook pages. Check back every Tuesday for a new Help a Mama Out tip!
Is your breastfed baby refusing bottles? Don’t panic! Dive into some reasons a nursing baby rejects the bottle and some tips to remedy bottle-feeding aversion.