Breastfeeding Truly Takes a Village!
A few months ago, we sent out a Call for Breastfeeding Stories. Our desire was to flood the Internet with beautiful breastfeeding stories of triumph, overcoming challenges and struggles, and positive outcomes, regardless of the total amount of milk a mom was producing. We are thrilled to share these stories with you, our readers, and hope that they offer support and inspiration for you, wherever you are in your breastfeeding journey.
Thank you to all of the mothers who submitted their stories! If after you read these memoirs you are inspired to submit your story, feel free to send it to RobinKaplan@sdbfc.com.
A few months ago, we sent out a Call for Breastfeeding Stories. Our desire was to flood the Internet with beautiful breastfeeding stories of triumph, overcoming challenges and struggles, and positive outcomes, regardless of the total amount of milk a mom was producing. We are thrilled to share these stories with you, our readers, and hope that they offer support and inspiration for you, wherever you are in your breastfeeding journey.
Thank you to all of the mothers who submitted their stories! If after you read these memoirs you are inspired to submit your story, feel free to send it to RobinKaplan@sdbfc.com.
This Breastfeeding Memoir is from Natalie
Before my son was even born, I knew I wanted to breastfeed him. I attended multiple classes on breastfeeding, stocked up on nursing pads, nipple butter, and felt as prepared as I could be prior to his arrival. After a precipitous labor/delivery, he ended up being born in front of the hospital! One benefit was that I got to hold him immediately, so we had lots of skin to skin time which was emphasized in the classes. We tried breastfeeding within one hour of his birth, and he immediately latched! We had a lactation consultant visit at the hospital, and she said everything looked great! I even scheduled my first lactation appointment at SD Breastfeeding Center when my son was 4 days old. We weren't having issues, but I quickly learned that breastfeeding my son was way different than the practice doll we used in the class! During that visit, I learned my son had lip and tongue ties. Nobody else evaluated him for these, but being tongue tied myself it didn't come as much of a surprise. Fortunately, he was transferring well and the ties did not seem to be interfering with his feeding.
Fast forward 2 weeks, and my son was not at his birth weight. He was feeding for over an hour, falling asleep, and seemed very irritable and unhappy. As a new mom, I assumed this was normal. I pushed on for another week and then decided to schedule another visit with the LC for an evaluation. There, I did a weighted feed and learned that he wasn't transferring effectively. The LC explained how he was being restricted by his lip and tongue ties, and this could potentially decrease my supply. She recommended I consider a release of his ties, so I immediately called a provider and had them addressed the next day.
I read how many mothers noticed instant results and symptom relief post release. I didn't notice immediate results, but was confident that things would improve over the next few weeks. When they didn't, I followed up with Melanie, our LC. She assessed him and noticed that he still seemed restricted, wasn't transferring adequately, and recommended we take him for body work. Due to his poor weight gain (6 oz in 2 weeks) she taught me how to use my breast pump and implement an SNS (supplemental nursing system). She also recommended a galactagogue supplement. Things weren't moving in the direction I wanted, but I was committed to do everything I could to continue breastfeeding.
At this point, I was feeling very defeated and inadequate. I felt like I was doing everything I could, and was so sad that my little baby was not growing at the rate he should. My pregnancy and delivery were so natural and without issue that I naively thought breastfeeding would follow. I called my sister in law, who happens to be a breastfeeding mother. She immediately came over with galactagogue-rich foods and tea, and even pumped for my son while I built up my supply!
After additional LC visits, support groups, and the implementation of bodywork, I made the decision to have a second release for my son. Even though we are still post op and performing stretches, I already am seeing results. My son is happier, and I no longer have to use the SNS system. I have a nice freezer stash of my milk, and he is thriving with weight gain. He's not even three months old, so I don't know how this journey will end. I do know, however, that I'll do everything I can to preserve our nursing relationship. Without the help of multiple providers, I'm not sure where we would be. "It takes a village" is such an appropriate phrase for this season of my life. I am so thankful to live in a community that has SO much support for breastfeeding mothers.
Breastfeeding After Breast Reduction - A Memoir
A few months ago, we sent out a Call for Breastfeeding Stories. Our desire was to flood the Internet with beautiful breastfeeding stories of triumph, overcoming challenges and struggles, and positive outcomes, regardless of the total amount of milk a mom was producing. We are thrilled to share these stories with you, our readers, and hope that they offer support and inspiration for you, wherever you are in your breastfeeding journey.
Thank you to all of the mothers who submitted their stories! If after you read these memoirs you are inspired to submit your story, feel free to send it to RobinKaplan@sdbfc.com.
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This breastfeeding memoir is from Jenna
Ten years ago, eighteen-year-old Jenna was bouncing between San Diego and Los Angeles counties looking for a plastic surgeon. They had to be willing to do a keyhole incision and leave my nipple attached while they performed a bilateral breast reduction. I was a senior in high school and had my breast reduction surgery during spring break.
Fast forward six years. I find out I'm pregnant the day my boyfriend gets to Djibouti, Africa, where he'll be deployed for the next 7 months. I sought out a natural birth provider in my network after reading the book, Defining your Own Success: Breastfeeding After Breast Reduction Surgery by Diana West. In this book, it encouraged mothers to birth as naturally as possible for the best chance at breastfeeding after a reduction and this book had become like a Bible for me, so I followed its every recommendation.
A few months ago, we sent out a Call for Breastfeeding Stories. Our desire was to flood the Internet with beautiful breastfeeding stories of triumph, overcoming challenges and struggles, and positive outcomes, regardless of the total amount of milk a mom was producing. We are thrilled to share these stories with you, our readers, and hope that they offer support and inspiration for you, wherever you are in your breastfeeding journey.
Thank you to all of the mothers who submitted their stories! If after you read these memoirs you are inspired to submit your story, feel free to send it to RobinKaplan@sdbfc.com.
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This breastfeeding memoir is from Jenna
Ten years ago, eighteen-year-old Jenna was bouncing between San Diego and Los Angeles counties looking for a plastic surgeon. They had to be willing to do a keyhole incision and leave my nipple attached while they performed a bilateral breast reduction. I was a senior in high school and had my breast reduction surgery during spring break.
Fast forward six years. I find out I'm pregnant the day my boyfriend gets to Djibouti, Africa, where he'll be deployed for the next 7 months. I sought out a natural birth provider in my network after reading the book, Defining your Own Success: Breastfeeding After Breast Reduction Surgery by Diana West. In this book, it encouraged mothers to birth as naturally as possible for the best chance at breastfeeding after a reduction and this book had become like a Bible for me, so I followed its every recommendation. After finding midwives, a doula and a baby-friendly hospital, I looked for an IBCLC and a Breastfeeding 101 class. I knew I needed to be prepared or I would succumb to all of the "boobie traps" within the first few days. My daughter was born on the much later end of normal, well past 42 weeks, was 9lbs 11oz at birth, and was born with a tongue tie and upper lip tie. I was given hell at the hospital for not wanting to give her formula, after requesting several times to be seen by the in-house IBCLC. The nurses and pediatricians said they'd never seen a mother be able to exclusively breastfeed after a reduction and feared that I wouldn't feed my baby because of my determination to nurse.
At 6 weeks old, my daughter was diagnosed with life-threatening food allergies making even allergen-free, prescription-only formula not an option. The first six weeks I pumped after every feeding. My husband spoon-fed, finger-fed, syringe-fed, cup-fed, & I used an SNS. At our 2 month pediatrician appointment, our doctor told me to quit trying and that what we were doing wasn't sustainable. I sought out chiropractic care, craniosacral therapy, multiple tongue tie revisions, continuous IBCLC care, breastfeeding support groups, homeopathic remedies, acupuncture, removed all allergens from my diet, quit my job, and somehow decided, breastfeeding was worth it all. From eight weeks old, we exclusively nursed through recurring tongue ties, vasospasms, low milk supply, mastitis, severe food allergies, thrush, and an abscess, for over 3 years, through a pregnancy and tandem nursing for a year and a half. Her younger sister is 28 months and we don't see an end in sight.
We Were Not Meant to Mother Alone
A few months ago, we sent out a Call for Breastfeeding Stories. Our desire was to flood the Internet with beautiful breastfeeding stories of triumph, overcoming challenges and struggles, and positive outcomes, regardless of the total amount of milk a mom was producing. We are thrilled to share these stories with you, our readers, and hope that they offer support and inspiration for you, wherever you are in your breastfeeding journey.
Thank you to all of the mothers who submitted their stories! If after you read these memoirs you are inspired to submit your story, feel free to send it to RobinKaplan@sdbfc.com.
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Our first breastfeeding memoir is from Michelle
I booked at least 2 vacations for my maternity leave, all on airplanes. I was going to wear my baby everywhere, nursing her as we went along. I had the organic breast pads purchased, all the nursing tanks, and the most breastfeeding-friendly bottles, but of course I wouldn’t need those for at least several months. I would see Mamas nursing their babes at the beach and I would find myself staring as I daydreamed about my nursling that was to come. December 2013, my sweet baby girl arrived. She latched and we were a nursing team. 24hrs later I was told she was Coombs positive and her jaundice levels were high. She was sleepy, was losing too much weight and I needed to give her formula in a bottle. I cried lots of tears. "FORMULA? No way!", but I had no other options. Every time I fed her, and I wouldn’t let anyone else feed her. I felt awful and felt like I was letting her down. 7 days later I was told, "your daughter is failure to thrive". Queue more tears, more formula, more guilt, and not a lot of milk being produced from me.
A few months ago, we sent out a Call for Breastfeeding Stories. Our desire was to flood the Internet with beautiful breastfeeding stories of triumph, overcoming challenges and struggles, and positive outcomes, regardless of the total amount of milk a mom was producing. We are thrilled to share these stories with you, our readers, and hope that they offer support and inspiration for you, wherever you are in your breastfeeding journey.
Thank you to all of the mothers who submitted their stories! If after you read these memoirs you are inspired to submit your story, feel free to send it to RobinKaplan@sdbfc.com.
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Our first breastfeeding memoir is from Michelle
I booked at least 2 vacations for my maternity leave, all on airplanes. I was going to wear my baby everywhere, nursing her as we went along. I had the organic breast pads purchased, all the nursing tanks, and the most breastfeeding-friendly bottles, but of course I wouldn’t need those for at least several months. I would see Mamas nursing their babes at the beach and I would find myself staring as I daydreamed about my nursling that was to come. December 2013, my sweet baby girl arrived. She latched and we were a nursing team. 24hrs later I was told she was Coombs positive and her jaundice levels were high. She was sleepy, was losing too much weight and I needed to give her formula in a bottle. I cried lots of tears. "FORMULA? No way!", but I had no other options. Every time I fed her, and I wouldn’t let anyone else feed her. I felt awful and felt like I was letting her down. 7 days later I was told, "your daughter is failure to thrive". Queue more tears, more formula, more guilt, and not a lot of milk being produced from me.
Over the next month, my journey consisted of doctors’ visits, pumping 8x a day, a baby screaming at the breast due to bottle preference and low supply, tube feeding, domperidone, and yet my milk never fully came in. 5 weeks in, a friend asked me to go to a breastfeeding support group. I went and hoped no one would notice me feeding formula to my sweet baby who wouldn't latch more than 5 minutes. Everyone noticed, yet no one judged me.
3 months in, at the Breastfeeding Support group that I now attended weekly, a Mama who I hardly knew asked if I wanted her to pump for me, and then another offered to help, as well. This would begin my donor milk journey, and a mental shift in my head that allowed me to stop seeing what I wasn't capable of, and start enjoying the beauty that came from a community that would end up feeding both of my babes! I threw away my pumping and tube feeding schedule right along with the lies that told me I wasn't enough because I couldn't get my body to do what I needed to do to fully feed my baby. We kept nursing as much as possible until 10 months and she got half formula and half donor milk.
A few months later, I was pregnant with my son. After my prenatal appointment at the San Diego Breastfeeding Center, I got permission from my doctor to start hand expressing at 37 weeks to collect colostrum to give my baby in the hospital through syringe feeding at the breast to help flush any jaundice he would have since he would be Coombs positive, as well. I started to collect donor milk and I had a community that donated enough breastmilk to supply him 9 full months as I only provided him about 30% of his needs with my own supply. He was born and I had a tiny bit more milk and a lot more confidence. I knew that no matter what, a nourished baby is a loved baby. I knew now that if I needed to give formula, I wasn't less of a mother. If I fed my baby pumped milk, donated milk, only could nurse a few times a day, used a cover, didn't use a cover, nursed for 3 months or nursed for 3 years, no matter what, I WAS ENOUGH. Even after a 6 day stay in the hospital for his Coombs, a tongue and lip tie revision, and a micro supply, we nursed for 10 months with donor milk through the SNS tube feeding at the breast. We then fed formula in a bottle and nursed as often as he wanted. He nursed until 16 months.
Today I am working towards my IBCLC, because of the non-judgmental support I received from the San Diego Breastfeeding Center community. They didn't sprinkle magic fairy breastfeeding dust on me that fixed all issues, but they gave me a plan that was doable. They gave me tools to accomplish the goals I set for myself. They gave me hope and they provided me with a community that was there to cheer me on. When I think about my breastfeeding journey, it is less about feeding my children, and more about the discovery that we Mamas cannot mother alone; we were never intended to do so. It takes a village to raise a baby, and for me, it took a village to feed mine. I am forever grateful.
Call for Your Breastfeeding Stories!
This year’s theme for World Breastfeeding Week is Sustaining Breastfeeding Together, which really brings forth the collaborative nature of breastfeeding. When I think about the components that shape a mother’s breastfeeding experience, the first thing that come to mind is support. Who is part of her ‘Dream Team of Breastfeeding Support’? Her partner? Her family and friends? Her doctors and midwives? Her lactation consultant? Her local and online community? All of these connections shape how we view ourselves as a breastfeeding mother and how successful we feels about ourselves and our experience. Since not all of us are fortunate to have a huge system of in-person breastfeeding support, online support can be critical.
This year’s theme for World Breastfeeding Week is Sustaining Breastfeeding Together, which really brings forth the collaborative nature of breastfeeding. When I think about the components that shape a mother’s breastfeeding experience, the first thing that come to mind is support. Who is part of her ‘Dream Team of Breastfeeding Support’? Her partner? Her family and friends? Her doctors and midwives? Her lactation consultant? Her local and online community? All of these connections shape how we view ourselves as a breastfeeding mother and how successful we feels about ourselves and our experience. Since not all of us are fortunate to have a huge system of in-person breastfeeding support, online support can be critical.
Over the years we have collected breastfeeding memoirs from our readers. Our goal is to share the many different ways that mothers breastfeed, each story highlighting different challenges that may arise and how mothers are resilient and determined to find success, whatever that may look like to them.
This August, in honor of the 2017 World Breastfeeding Week’s theme, we are sending out a call for YOUR breastfeeding memoir. Would you like to share your story so that another mother may find support from and connection to your experience? Did you overcome a challenge? Did the support of another person help shape your breastfeeding experience?
Details:
- We will be collecting breastfeeding memoirs from August 1 - September 15, 2017.
- Each memoir should be between 150-250 words and include a photo
- Each memoir must be original content
- All selected memoirs will be posted on the SDBFC website’s blog and be considered for inclusion in an upcoming breastfeeding book!
Possible topics, but not limited to:
Increasing milk supply
- Going back to work
- Overcoming breastfeeding challenges
- Breastfeeding after a NICU stay
- Breastfeeding after breast surgery
- Tongue tie
- Breastfeeding twins
- Positive nursing in public experience
- Full term breastfeeding
- Tandem nursing
Feel free to post any questions in the comments.
Please email your original breastfeeding memoir and photo(s) to Robin Kaplan (robinkaplan@sdbfc.com)
There are so many online stories of moms feeling like they’ve failed…. Let’s flood the Internet with stories of triumph!
Breastfeeding Memoirs: Best 'Bring Your Baby to Work' Situation EVER!
In honor of World Breastfeeding Week 2015, we are sharing inspirational stories from breastfeeding/working moms.
Today’s story was written by Margo Byrd.
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As a new mother, the fear of going back to work haunted me as my maternity leave days grew smaller and smaller. Although I am one of the most fortunate mothers in the world who got to bring their child to work, I still feared that somehow it would not work out. I worried that my company would decide my bundle of joy was not so joyous, or I would completely collapse under the pressure of feeding a 3 month old in my office. I personally struggled with postpartum. I had irrational fears about what it would be like at work, felt completely helpless on multiple occasions, and had a very hard time letting my son out of my sight even to run to the bathroom (when my husband was home). As those small fears subsided, coincidentally my bigger fear of breastfeeding in my new work environment grew. For the summer, my office would be shared with my boss as I am her assistant and during the school year I would have my own office (which happens to be all glass). I work for the Boys and Girls Clubs of San Dieguito and while “Bring your child to work,” has always been a motto for our club, the fear of breastfeeding with 70-150 kids on the other side of my door was very apparent. I envisioned curling up on a toilet wiping everything down with cleaners or hiding in dark closets on the floor while I lulled my 3 month old to sleep while comfort nursing. While I was promised a, “Safe,” environment to nurse I had no idea what to expect. The struggle of postpartum and the struggle of a new environment breastfeeding made me so nervous. I had never nursed in public, let alone nursed in front of my co-workers and peers. Personally I was too scared and too naive to understand the support I would have at my job.
In honor of World Breastfeeding Week 2015, we are sharing inspirational stories from breastfeeding/working moms.
Today’s story was written by Margo Byrd.
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As a new mother, the fear of going back to work haunted me as my maternity leave days grew smaller and smaller. Although I am one of the most fortunate mothers in the world who got to bring their child to work, I still feared that somehow it would not work out. I worried that my company would decide my bundle of joy was not so joyous, or I would completely collapse under the pressure of feeding a 3 month old in my office. I personally struggled with postpartum. I had irrational fears about what it would be like at work, felt completely helpless on multiple occasions, and had a very hard time letting my son out of my sight even to run to the bathroom (when my husband was home). As those small fears subsided, coincidentally my bigger fear of breastfeeding in my new work environment grew. For the summer, my office would be shared with my boss as I am her assistant and during the school year I would have my own office (which happens to be all glass). I work for the Boys and Girls Clubs of San Dieguito and while “Bring your child to work,” has always been a motto for our club, the fear of breastfeeding with 70-150 kids on the other side of my door was very apparent. I envisioned curling up on a toilet wiping everything down with cleaners or hiding in dark closets on the floor while I lulled my 3 month old to sleep while comfort nursing. While I was promised a, “Safe,” environment to nurse I had no idea what to expect. The struggle of postpartum and the struggle of a new environment breastfeeding made me so nervous. I had never nursed in public, let alone nursed in front of my co-workers and peers. Personally I was too scared and too naive to understand the support I would have at my job.
I had made up my mind when attending my first meeting with my supervisors to quit. With my hormonal self and hormonal worries I just felt that it was going to be a disaster. Yet, as my son, Charlie, and I were greeted by each of my co-workers and supervisors, I started to see the support for my son’s health and well being would not only be my priority, but my entire leadership team’s priority. I was greeted with warm smiles and happy faces. To my surprise one of the first questions everyone asked was, “Are you still going to breastfeed?” I sheepishly answered, “I am going to try,” and each person in my leadership team smiled and said, “Go girl!” The more people I talked with, the more I realized that our company fully supported my commitment to breastfeed him each and every day.
One of the first things my company did was set up my office. Not only did they put in a curtain to cover the glass in my office, my supervisor told me that whenever I needed to feed my son, I would have a quiet and safe place to do so. They fashioned my office to make it more suitable for a changing table, pack and play, and a swing, as well as make sure my son had what he needed to be happy and healthy. They removed large filing cabinets and replaced them with smaller ones so I could maneuver them so I could fit everything comfortably. Over the summer, when I began to share an office with my boss, her commitment to making me feel comfortable was overwhelming. My boss brought in extra items in case my son needed them, she did not put me on the schedule (so I could arrive within reasonable hours to take care of my son), and suggested making a sign for my door that said, “Feeding Charlie, Please Knock before Entering.” I was completely overwhelmed with the support to breastfeed from the beginning. And the most beautiful part of all of this was, even staff members who saw my sign on the door would knock and enter without hesitation. Males, females, co-worker’s children and volunteers all felt comfortable and normal walking in. I even held staff meetings with multiple staff at a time while feeding my son and the wonderful response to my question, “Would you mind if I fed my son,” was welcomed with an overwhelming, “Absolutely!”
While I know I am blessed and incredibly lucky, I can only speak from my experience. Each and every day is still challenging with our regular breastfeeding issues, but having the support of my co-workers and leadership team has been incredible. I can contribute to my family, provide the best nutrients for my son through breastfeeding, and I can continue to watch my son grow within the walls of the Boys and Girls Clubs of San Dieguito.
Breastfeeding Memoirs: Working as a Resident
In honor of World Breastfeeding Week 2015, we are sharing inspirational stories from breastfeeding/working moms.
Today’s story was written by Amelia Sorenson.
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When I found out I was pregnant as I was about to start a surgical fellow, which can mean a seven day, sixty (sometimes eighty) hour work week with erratic long nights of call, I thought a lot about what it would be like to do the work while pregnant and how to manage maternity leave (six weeks, worked the day I delivered). What I didn't think about was how I would establish a breastfeeding relationship during those first few short weeks and how I would manage to keep breastfeeding when I went back.
In honor of World Breastfeeding Week 2015, we are sharing inspirational stories from breastfeeding/working moms.
Today’s story was written by Amelia Sorenson.
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When I found out I was pregnant as I was about to start a surgical fellow, which can mean a seven day, sixty (sometimes eighty) hour work week with erratic long nights of call, I thought a lot about what it would be like to do the work while pregnant and how to manage maternity leave (six weeks, worked the day I delivered). What I didn't think about was how I would establish a breastfeeding relationship during those first few short weeks and how I would manage to keep breastfeeding when I went back.
PHOTO BY ERIN AT THE THEO LOVES
Once my son was born I realized I should have been preparing for breastfeeding. I went to a breastfeeding support group three times in the first week and am so grateful to the mothers I met and the support from the lactation consultants. (First piece of advice - figure out support groups BEFORE baby arrives and utilize them early. Every time baby latches he is learning what to do, so the quicker you can get him doing it right, the better).
The night before I started back at work my brand-new electric pump made one long whirrrr and wouldn't turn on again….necessitating a frantic trip to buy a hand pump (Second - buy a hand pump just in case). I was more than anxious that first day back with my little cooler and hand pump. Fortunately, I work in a “baby-friendly” hospital and a NICU nurse gave me a kit to the hospital grade pump and a few days later I found the most beautiful lactation room with a view of the ocean (Third - Figure out where you will be pumping before you leave for maternity leave).
I’ve never been able to make a schedule since surgical case length and clinic patients are too different, so I decided that food for my baby had to be on the list of priorities and that some pumping is better than no pumping and tried to pump every three to four hours. (Fourth – Feeding your baby is something important; so let yourself treat it like it is a priority).
Orthopedics is 90% men and I am the first woman in a long time to have a baby, so I’ve been straightforward about what I am doing, hoping that it will make it easier for the next resident. (Fifth – Tell people what you are doing. You have to do it a lot and really aren’t taking a break.)
Now that we have made it to 6 months and have enough supply to have donated milk I want to say that you can do it too! Don’t give up early or think that because you are working long hours you can’t do it. Most of all enjoy the time with your baby before your go back to work.
PHOTO BY ERIN AT THE THEO LOVES
Breastfeeding Memoirs: Returning to Work in the Navy
In honor of World Breastfeeding Week 2015, we are sharing inspirational stories from breastfeeding/working -- moms.
Today’s story was written by Cinda Brown.
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I’m an active duty Navy officer and mother of two girls. My journey to becoming a working, breastfeeding mother started almost 4 years ago with the birth of my first daughter. Breastfeeding was challenging in more ways than I could have imagined. I thought that it would just be easy and natural, not knowing that those two little words can mean so many different things.
In honor of World Breastfeeding Week 2015, we are sharing inspirational stories from breastfeeding/working -- moms.
Today’s story was written by Cinda Brown.
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I’m an active duty Navy officer and mother of two girls. My journey to becoming a working, breastfeeding mother started almost 4 years ago with the birth of my first daughter. Breastfeeding was challenging in more ways than I could have imagined. I thought that it would just be easy and natural, not knowing that those two little words can mean so many different things.
My baby had a high palate combined with tongue and lip tie. I had no idea what this was. All I knew is that my nipple was damaged and cut from her very first latch and that it hurt each time there after. Soon I was scabbed and crying each time she latched. So much pain. I didn’t know where to get help and the nurses at the hospital told me it would get better with time. When my daughter was about 5 weeks old I finally met a nurse who promptly referred me to a pediatrician who was also an IBCLC. Her issues were diagnosed and we were then set up for a revision. I learned so much from this IBCLC. He taught my husband what to look for and we both were sent home with more knowledge that helped us on our road to success. My husband knew what looked wrong and was there to help me reposition. He supported me through all of the pain and sleepless nights. He did diaper changes and baths and allowed me to keep working on breastfeeding, instead of asking to bottle feed so he could bond. He found other ways to really bond with our baby girl while ensuring that our breastfeeding relationship would be preserved. Partners play such an important role and I can’t say this enough!
Once my daughter and I finally started to get the hang of breastfeeding, it was time for me to go back to work. I struggled with a very intense oversupply and was worried about how I was going to manage it when I was back at work. It had been difficult enough to manage it when I just had to take care of my baby at home, but now I was looking at adding in daycare, going back to work full time, and still trying to keep up with everything else that needed to be done at home. While many people I’ve encountered have told me how lucky I am to have oversupply, I also know that it’s very difficult to manage. It takes an extraordinary amount of time to pump, collect, freeze, and store the milk not to mention the washing of all of the pump parts. Adding this extra needed time into an already compressed day was overwhelming to think of, much less try to put into action.
We were very lucky to find a daycare teacher who was experienced with bottle-feeding breastfed babies. That was hurdle #1. She was an amazing communicator, which helped the process so much more. The day came to go back to work and I still remember it like it was yesterday because the experience is forever imprinted in my memory. Leaving my baby girl with someone new for the first time to go back to work was just devastating to me. And her. For me I felt like it absolutely went against my innate knowing to separate us. But yet I had no choice and my leave was over so it was time to go back. In that moment I would have given anything to stay home with her. Having a caring provider and making the most of the time that I did have with my baby while at home helped to ease the separation but it definitely took time before that ache started to subside. I really had no idea about the obstacles I was about to encounter and had no one to guide me along the way.
Day one back at work, I found myself in a land of cubicles, with no place to pump breastmilk. Over the next several months I improvised wherever I could to find a place to pump when I needed to. I pumped in bathrooms, in my car in the parking lot, in my car on the way to and from meetings, basically anywhere I could find that would provide some sense of privacy and still allow me to complete work requirements. It was far from ideal and was super stressful, and mastitis and clogged ducts became more usual than unusual. I had to wake up super early before work so that I could pump since I would be so engorged. Wash parts. Try not to forget parts, bottles, or storage bags. Or the plug for the pump! So many things to remember!
My job had been so busy and intense before I had my baby and I knew that it was going to be no different when I returned. The biggest challenge was trying to coordinate pumping between meetings that for the most part I didn’t have a lot of control over scheduling. Many times meetings would come up at the last minute, or would be rescheduled right in the middle of when I’d need to pump. I had to figure out a way to talk to my supervisors about my need to pump, the importance of keeping a regular schedule, and at the same time keep my head held high.
In the military culture, it can be intimidating to ask your supervisor for permission to do things outside of the norm or what’s expected. I wanted to be able to show that I was able to handle it all: be a successful officer and a successful mother. But the reality is that each demands 100% or more of a person, and there’s only so much effort and time that can be allotted to each. Some compromises had to be made, and it was up to me to advocate for myself and my baby. I’m not going to say that the conversations were the most comfortable that I’ve ever had or the most easy, or that they were well received. They certainly were not. But I thought of all of the other more junior women going through the same journey and realized that if I couldn’t advocate and speak up for myself, then there’s no way that my example would set other women up for success.
I asked for what I needed and over time it became more normal for everyone I worked with. I did find out something very interesting in that most of the people I worked with were male, and that their wives/partners were full time stay at home parents. None of them were mothers who had breastfed and many of their wives had not breastfed. Education and communication with my male leadership helped them to realize the importance of breastfeeding and how it could in fact make the workplace better for everyone since breastfed babies tend to get sick less often. Mothers are able to get back into fitness standards more quickly since breastfeeding can help mothers lose weight. These are only a couple of examples amongst many. I know that the Navy is keenly interested in retaining females in order to have females rise in the ranks of leadership. Advocating for breastfeeding is one step in the right direction to retain mothers in the military. Mothers who are shamed or made to feel that they can’t fit in are not likely to want to stay as a part of an organization that can’t accept them for doing something that’s good for both their baby and themselves.
After several months of making do, a fellow military breastfeeding mother and I set out on a journey to have our commands come into compliance with current Navy breastfeeding instructions and guidance. This meant that our command was required to provide a room that wasn’t a bathroom space, with privacy, a locking door, a refrigerator/freezer, outlets, and furniture. It also allowed for time to pump milk that would accommodate what the mother would need to maintain her supply. It was a long process, but with diligence and help from many people, by the time I left my command there were 5 mother’s rooms set up for breastfeeding mothers to pump milk and an instruction that provided guidance so that mothers were protected in their ability to pump breastmilk. Each room had a multi-user pump and pump kits donated by the San Diego County Breastfeeding Coalition. The command won the SDCBC Breastfeeding Friendly Workplace Award in 2014, which was such an amazing accomplishment given where it had started from. A monthly breastfeeding support group led by Sarah Lin, IBCLC, started in 2013 and continues to this day. She selflessly stepped up to donate her time to help countless mothers who have so benefitted from her expertise when there was a definite need.
I’m now a mother of two and I honestly thought that going back to work for the 2nd time with an infant would be easier since I had done it before, but it’s been just as challenging. I’m at a new command, so I have new people to interact with. Dynamics are different and the juggling act of timing pumping around work requirements is still as alive today, if not more than it was when I went back to work with my first daughter. Mastitis and clogged ducts continue to make their presence known, which was disappointing since I thought that I had them figured out. Goes to show that just because it worked last time doesn’t mean that it will work this time. Each baby is so very different, as is each pregnancy and postpartum period. I’ve been known to excuse myself from meetings with very senior personnel so I can go pump, which hasn’t been easy. I know that I need to take care of myself so that I’ll be at work tomorrow. Sacrificing today isn’t worth getting sick tomorrow and I keep telling myself that. Because there’s a part of me that still struggles to have a voice and speak up for what I need.
I pumped for 2 years for my first daughter. She will be 4 this fall and breastfeeds right along with my infant. I’m pumping for my infant at work and will continue to do so until it’s the right time to stop. I never thought that I’d make it this far in our breastfeeding journey, but now I can’t imagine it being any other way. There have been so many that I can attribute our success to in our San Diego community. The amazing support of IBCLCs and mothers has carried me when I needed to be lifted up too many times to count. I hope that through my efforts I can help other military mothers achieve the success that they envision for breastfeeding their children, whether it be for days or years.
Breastfeeding Memoirs: My Three Bs
In honor of World Breastfeeding Week 2015, we are sharing inspirational stories from breastfeeding/working moms.
Today’s story was written by Louanne Ferro.
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Prior to May 27th, 2014, the word baby meant something very different to me: my baby was my business. At the young age of 17, I entered the world of cosmetology. Knowing I wanted to strive and create greatness in my industry, I focused on building. In 13 year's time, I had nurtured my baby and created a small empire. One of the leading educators for the world's largest professional beauty company, I frequently traveled to teach my craft. In the heart of North Park, I opened my very own salon. My baby was thriving and I was the proud mother, spending further countless hours tending to make it what it is today. Then, May 27th, 2014 happened, changing everything I knew about babies.
The test was positive. To my shock, my work "baby" was going to be replaced with a real-life, micro-human! My pregnancy was something my husband and I had been hoping for and we were thrilled!
In honor of World Breastfeeding Week 2015, we are sharing inspirational stories from breastfeeding/working moms.
Today’s story was written by Louanne Ferro.
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Prior to May 27th, 2014, the word baby meant something very different to me: my baby was my business. At the young age of 17, I entered the world of cosmetology. Knowing I wanted to strive and create greatness in my industry, I focused on building. In 13 year's time, I had nurtured my baby and created a small empire. One of the leading educators for the world's largest professional beauty company, I frequently traveled to teach my craft. In the heart of North Park, I opened my very own salon. My baby was thriving and I was the proud mother, spending further countless hours tending to make it what it is today. Then, May 27th, 2014 happened, changing everything I knew about babies.
The test was positive. To my shock, my work "baby" was going to be replaced with a real-life, micro-human! My pregnancy was something my husband and I had been hoping for and we were thrilled!
As the days went by and I soaked in the reality of this new chapter in our lives, I quickly realized that the acronym B.B. meant far more than a makeup product; my new "B.B." was Business and Baby! I started to prepare myself with all things human baby-related. In addition to the copious things on lists and registries, preparing for the physical exit of my child by way of my body required some serious consideration. My birth plan was short and extreme: 1. Do whatever you need to do to deliver a healthy baby, and 2. If baby and mom get separated, dad goes with baby. My preparations seemed both rational and thoughtful.
As the months crawled forward, I was asked, "Do you plan to breastfeed?" "Sure," I would state casually. I mean, doesn't everybody do it? The portrayal of happy mothers stroking their babies' heads seems the most natural and obvious choice. The commitment to breastfeeding tacked a third B on my list. Self-assured, I reiterated to myself, "Three Bs and three-step birth plan." Simple right?
As the ideas gestated, so did my little human. On February 1st, 2015 when most people seemed to be watching the Patriots win the Super Bowl after the controversial "Deflategate," I was in labor. I had no delusions of grandeur, and felt that the experience progressed well, or at least as well as it could. Literally dancing myself into labor, and thus, the hospital, I was celebrating my salon partner's thirtieth birthday only the night before.
In a lighthearted moment of somewhat inappropriate comedic relief, as I was pushing my sweet boy into the world, my husband, nurse staff, and I were laughing while Maureen, the midwife, styled my son's full head of hair mid-birth canal into a Mohawk for his grand exit. Ezra entered the world healthy and strong, with all the right parts and two healthy lungs. Things were great, that is, until they weren't. Laying him on my naked breast, as I looked into his eyes for the first time, all I could say was, "I'm going to be sick." Those weren't the words I was expecting to first say to my baby.
Before I knew it, Ezra was being transferred to my husband chest and my birth plan, the one that everyone says won't be needed, became needed. Ripping itself from my uterus, the placenta dislodged, and I, unknowingly, quickly began to bleed out. Because the hospital staff was great, the bleeding quickly stopped and I was generally unaware of the severity my body endured. Before I fully understood what had happened, I was on the mend. So I thought...
Latching my son in the hospital, he seemed to latch well. We left the hospital feeling very supported and excited to start our new lives as parents, and I was eager to be a mother who could sustain life solely from my own body. This, too, proved that things could go well until again, they don't. Shortly after arriving to our home as a family of three, I noticed my son no longer wanted to latch. Unable to wake him for feeds, we were heading down a slippery slope at excruciatingly high speeds. With no formula in the house because it wasn't part of the "plan" and no idea what was wrong, helplessness took hold of me and rattled this new parent's head and heart. Breast feeding should be easy, right? Everyone does it! It's natural.
I held my baby through the night, the first night home, praying we'd make it until morning when I would seek professional support. There was no marveling over the beauty of childbirth or reveling in the moment that our chests rose and fell together. This was the worst night imaginable. In the mean time, it was after midnight and my husband scoured for 24-hour stores, and finding none, finally sought out a NICU nurse at the hospital to get the formula an after-hours advice nurse suggested.
As the sun rose, I ran into the Kaiser breastfeeding support group, crying my eyes out as I told the head lactation counselor that I was starving my baby and I didn't know why. I was failing, and failing was something I was never good at doing. Rose, this angel, this pinnacle of breastfeeding knowledge, sat with me most of the support group and promptly made me a one-on-one appointment following the support group that day. Ezra had lost over 20 percent of his birth weight and was comparable to a premature baby. She asked me to share my story leading up to that point, and as soon as I mentioned the hemorrhage, she exclaimed, "There's your road block. You're not broken, you're healing." Not fully understanding, I listened, captivated by what the angel was telling me. She explained to me that our bodies can almost always produce milk for our babies, but major blood loss was one hindrance that halts milk production in its track. My body was healing me so it then could support my baby.
A woman - a new mom, rather - on a mission, I spent 24/7 learning how to help kickstart my supply, all the while supplementing at the breast, and educating myself on how to properly feed my baby. This harrowing and hormonal journey took a couple weeks, but my milk eventually came in and I had a new routine. I referred to myself as "The Dairy Queen," and I was always open for sweet treats!
Realizing quickly, in order to be successful with breastfeeding, I also needed to be knowledgable. This, after all, was one of the most important jobs I'd ever had. My short eight-week maternity leave was filled with work, just not the type of work I was accustomed to. My 13-year-old older child, my business, was doing well, but still needed my care. Much like a regular teen, it seemed as though it could self-manage, but a true mother, I realized it needed me to continue to grow. A new balancing act had begun. My new baby and breastfeeding also needed my constant care, and as the weeks passed, I slowly figured out how to balance my three Bs.
The key to success in working and breastfeeding, I have found, is to set boundaries with myself, my clients, and colleagues. Making food for my baby was just as important as my business. My work schedule has a pump break every three hours and for no circumstance should that pump break be booked - after all, it is my most important appointment of the day. When traveling for my company, it's made known that pump breaks must be allotted in order for me to take the job. Compromising my need to feed is not an option. My hands-free pump bra and car adapter for my breast pump have become my best friends. They really do support me. The ladies at the drive through coffee shop now know me as the pumping, purple haired mom as I pull through for my iced coffee while pumping on my way to work. My friends on speaker often ask, "Is that noise I hear your pump?" I say, "Sure is" with a smile, knowing that I am finding balance.
My flanges might not be a Marc Jacobs accessory, and my black pump bag may not be Prada, but I wear them with the same sense of excitement because I'm doing something I thought I couldn't achieve. They are also symbolic reminders of a label I do wear: mother, maker of milk and master of the Three-B balance, business, baby, and breastfeeding. My journey has not been lengthy, but on August 1, the first day of World Breastfeeding Week, I will celebrate my six-month "nurse-iversary." I've always argued that you can't hold a driven woman back, and now I know another word synonymous with driven woman is "mom!"
Breastfeeding Memoirs: Persevering when Returning to Work
In honor of World Breastfeeding Week 2015, we are sharing inspirational stories from breastfeeding/working moms.
Today’s story was written by Maggie.
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I had a long, stressful delivery that resulted in an emergency c-section, a tongue tie revision on day 2, followed by 48 hours in NICU. I was given a nipple shield, instructed to supplement with formula through an SNS and sent on my way. Breastfeeding was painful and difficult even with the shield, I went to many support group meetings and did weighed feeds and was able to stop supplementing. We were also dealing with a "colicky" baby until about week 8 . Then at week 10, I was able to get off the nipple shield with the help of an LC at Mary Birch. I was supposed to go back to work after 12 weeks but I was so exhausted and we were finally starting to turn a corner where we could actually enjoy our time with baby, I thankfully was able to extend my maternity leave to 16 weeks.
This prelude is to say that with all the struggles we went through in the beginning, I was very anxious about going back to work, whether I would make enough milk, whether he would get nipple confusion or a bottle preference. I worked so hard and suffered through so much literal blood, sweat, and tears to make breastfeeding work I started to really resent the fact that I had to go to work and interrupt our breastfeeding relationship.
In honor of World Breastfeeding Week 2015, we are sharing inspirational stories from breastfeeding/working moms.
Today’s story was written by Maggie.
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I had a long, stressful delivery that resulted in an emergency c-section, a tongue tie revision on day 2, followed by 48 hours in NICU. I was given a nipple shield, instructed to supplement with formula through an SNS and sent on my way. Breastfeeding was painful and difficult even with the shield, I went to many support group meetings and did weighed feeds and was able to stop supplementing. We were also dealing with a "colicky" baby until about week 8 . Then at week 10, I was able to get off the nipple shield with the help of an LC at Mary Birch. I was supposed to go back to work after 12 weeks but I was so exhausted and we were finally starting to turn a corner where we could actually enjoy our time with baby, I thankfully was able to extend my maternity leave to 16 weeks.
This prelude is to say that with all the struggles we went through in the beginning, I was very anxious about going back to work, whether I would make enough milk, whether he would get nipple confusion or a bottle preference. I worked so hard and suffered through so much literal blood, sweat, and tears to make breastfeeding work I started to really resent the fact that I had to go to work and interrupt our breastfeeding relationship.
Thankfully through my breastfeeding support group journeys I came to the San Diego Breastfeeding Center. She told me about the upcoming "going back to work" class. I was so excited! I had so many questions. I had scoured the internet, and learned a lot through websites, but still needed much more guidance and support. The information from that class helped me plan and feel prepared to go back to work.
Before I went on maternity leave, I worked out with my HR department where my lactation accommodation would be, but I didn't fully understand my needs until I returned. It was obvious that what we had planned was not going to be feasible long-term, so the first two weeks back were a challenge until they were able to give me my own office and make it private so that I could pump there. My pre-baby brain was trying to cause as little disturbance as possible to the rest of the office when planning my accommodations, but once I was back from maternity leave my only concern was making enough precious milk for my little guy! I'm grateful to have a supportive team at work that have had no issues whatsoever about giving me what I needed.
The first day back I barely pumped 9 oz. I was aiming for 12-15oz. I tried to keep calm and take it one day at a time. I still try to keep this mindset and not worry if I pump a little less some days. Gradually overtime I started consistently pumping 12 oz every day, and for a while was getting 16oz and was able to build a decent freezer stash. One of the LCs I met along my journeys suggested 5 minutes of hand expression after every pumping session, and that has worked wonders for me. It's amazing how much the pump leaves behind. The facebook group, "working moms who make breastfeeding work" has been also been an amazing resource.
We're now almost 4 months back at work and things are going smoothly. Bedsharing has been a saving grace...it helps my supply to let him nurse all night long, I don't worry about whether he is getting enough to eat or not, and I'm well rested for work each morning despite waking up every 2-3 hours all night. Plus its awesome snuggly bonding time that I miss out on while I'm working.
While I plan to breastfeed as long as baby wants to, I can't wait to break up with my pump in 4.5 months once he turns one!
Positive Breastfeeding in Public Stories - Britain ROCKS!
So much of what we hear about feeding our babies in public is negative - stories from women being harassed and shamed for breastfeeding in public. While we believe that it is so important to respond to these incidents and educate people on the importance of normalizing breastfeeding, we also think that one of the best ways we can empower women is to share our positive experiences as well. Below is one of many examples of wonderful responses women receive while feeding their babies in public - meet Claire!
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“Although I was born and brought up in the UK, my first experience of motherhood and subsequently breastfeeding was an all american one & in the Golden State of California. Although I had a nasty start to my mothering career (NICU, acid reflux & breastfeeding problems) I soon got into the swing of it, San Diego style. Motherhood is a serious business down in the 'Diego, but also a soft, fluffy, touchy, feely kind of business. I was part of a wonderful group of Mamas who did Stroller Strides. We were a village, a team, a sisterhood and to this day, I miss it. There was a genuine desire to help, share and offer advice, and an openness about breastfeeding was part of that. Initially I was embarrassed at whipping the girls out, but as time went on, that Bebe au Lait nursing cover got discarded and I felt comfortable feeding my first born wherever and whenever.
So much of what we hear about feeding our babies in public is negative - stories from women being harassed and shamed for breastfeeding in public. While we believe that it is so important to respond to these incidents and educate people on the importance of normalizing breastfeeding, we also think that one of the best ways we can empower women is to share our positive experiences as well. Below is one of many examples of wonderful responses women receive while feeding their babies in public - meet Claire!
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“Although I was born and brought up in the UK, my first experience of motherhood and subsequently breastfeeding was an all american one & in the Golden State of California. Although I had a nasty start to my mothering career (NICU, acid reflux & breastfeeding problems) I soon got into the swing of it, San Diego style. Motherhood is a serious business down in the 'Diego, but also a soft, fluffy, touchy, feely kind of business. I was part of a wonderful group of Mamas who did Stroller Strides. We were a village, a team, a sisterhood and to this day, I miss it. There was a genuine desire to help, share and offer advice, and an openness about breastfeeding was part of that. Initially I was embarrassed at whipping the girls out, but as time went on, that Bebe au Lait nursing cover got discarded and I felt comfortable feeding my first born wherever and whenever.
Fast forward to 2013 and I found myself back in the Land of my Birth. Such is the lot of a military family, we move frequently, but this was a good transition. I was going home! The plan was to try for another baby when we got to the UK. There were a few bumps in the road, but eventually Thomas made an appearance in December last year.
Now I have a very bad habit, (who doesn't, but it has a tendency to make the alarm bells go off in the sensationalist part of my brain) and that's my fondness for reading British tabloid newspapers. Hey, I needed to stay in touch with my old friends by knowing all of the British Z List wannabe's! It was my secret shame, come on, who doesn't love a bit of trash? My downfall is the Daily Mail (the British equivalent of the New York Post/National Enquirer) These guys could win Olympic Gold in rabble rousing. Their particular target seems to be breastfeeding mothers, as you can guarantee once a month there is an article dedicated to haranguing mothers for daring to feed their infants in public.
I think I managed to work myself up into such a frenzy that I was armed with a speech to challenge anyone who dared to try and stop me! Surprisingly, this hasn't been the case and I guess I am a little disappointed that I haven't had to inform anyone that if they tried to stop me, they were contravening the 2010 Equality Act! Of course, I have pre-empted any potential conflict with the return of the nursing cover, although this makes feeding a bit like getting in the ring with Mike Tyson, as Master Thomas does not like being covered up. I do get the sideways glances as they see the little feet thrashing around under a spotty pink cover, but I live in such a posh part of the country, everyone is far too polite to say anything!
Similarly, my expressing experience: on a rare date night with hubby we went all out and went for dinner at a very high class restaurant in London called Rules. This place is the real deal, I mean they filmed some of Downton Abbey there for goodness sake! But the half empty glass of water side of me fully expected to be relegated to the restrooms to pump, but if you don't ask, you don't get. Deep breath, let's ask the Maitre D, fully expecting a long look down the nose and face of horror. Shockingly, the gentleman in question not only said he could help me, but he took me to one of the private dining rooms and covered up the window so that I could pump in private. To top it off, he even bought me a glass of water! I wanted to kiss him and tell him that I wished all men were as open minded and affable as he. It seemed he was well versed in the womanly art of breastfeeding, as his wife breastfed all of their children and it was, in his words, a beautiful thing. Forget Bradley Cooper, this guy should be No1 on People Magazine's 100 Sexiest Men, because let's face it, there's nothing sexier than a man who acknowledges that breasts are more than just being Fun Bags for the Alpha Male!”
Do you have a positive breastfeeding in public story to share? Please email it to ashleytreadwell@sdbfc.com.