Breastfeeding the Older Baby: What to Expect at 9-12 Months

Originally published on May 1, 2016; Revised Feb 22, 2025

Author: Robin Kaplan, M.Ed, IBCLC, FNC

Welcome back to our blog series, Breastfeeding the Older Baby – What to Expect.

Today, let's talk about what to expect when chest/breastfeeding your older baby between 9 and 12 months. As your little one becomes more mobile and curious about the world, nursing can start to look a bit different—sometimes acrobatic, sometimes distracted, but still an important source of nourishment and comfort. Parents often wonder how breastmilk fits into their baby’s expanding diet and whether changes in feeding patterns are normal. Below, we’ll explore what to expect during this stage, what’s typical, and when you might want to reach out for support.

ABOUT SDBFC

The San Diego Breastfeeding Center was established in 2009 by Robin Kaplan, International Board Certified Lactation Consultant, Functional Nutritionist, and parent.  Her vision was to create a judgment-free, inclusive support system for families navigating infant feeding challenges.  SDBFC offers a wide range of one-on-one breastfeeding, infant feeding, and nutrition consultations - as well as classes, support groups, online articles, and social media - making it your one-stop-shop for all things infant feeding!

What does chest/breastfeeding look like in months 9-12? How often should my baby be eating and how long should feedings take?

Breastmilk (and/or formula) continues to be your baby’s primary source of nutrition until his/her first birthday. Some babies will continue to space out their nursing sessions as they approach this milestone birthday, nursing 4-5 times during the day, and once or more during the night. As your little one begins to explore the tastes and textures of more solid foods and consume more of them at each sitting,  you may notice your little one beginning to nurse less frequently in response to their increased intake of solid foods. As long as your baby is continuing to have five or more wet diapers each day, gains an average of 2-3oz per week, and seems satisfied and content after nursing sessions, then your little one is most likely getting enough nutrition while chest/breastfeeding.

 

When will my baby begin to drop his/her nighttime feeding sessions and sleep through the night?

Such a great question, and one that’s frequently on parents’ minds! When will my baby sleep longer at night? The short answer is - every baby is different. Babies wake throughout the night for varying reasons, including hunger, a need for comfort, a disruption in their sleep cycle, a need for a diaper change, sickness, teething, etc. Chest/breastfeeding often meets more than one of baby’s needs, so it’s easy to fall into the routine of nursing your little one back to sleep. There is absolutely nothing wrong with responding to your little one’s needs by nursing them! If you are happy with your nighttime routine, no need to make significant changes in order to cope with outside pressure and recommendations to “train” your baby to sleep longer at night. That being said, if you find yourself becoming frustrated with nighttime wakings and overtired during the day due to lack of sleep at night, then it might be time to take a closer look at your nighttime routine to make a plan for improving your quality of sleep.

I’ve heard people mention teaching chest/breastfeeding manners to older babies. How does that work?

It’s never too early to start teaching your little one age-appropriate manners. Just as we prompt our toddlers for “the magic word” when they ask for something, older babies can learn to be polite when chest/breastfeeding. Teaching your little one a few basic signs from American Sign Language can be very beneficial in setting the stage for chest/breastfeeding manners. The signs for milk, more, and please are fairly basic and many babies pick up on them quickly. Once your little one has mastered the sign for milk, you can calmly remind them to sign milk when hungry instead of pulling your shirt down or crying out in frustration. Positive reinforcement will go a long way to reinforce the idea that you would like baby to sign milk when hungry rather than clawing at your chest. Baby will also be calmer and happier, seeing you sign milk, showing them you hear and understand their need and are going to chest/breastfeed them soon.

 

My baby has been refusing to nurse, could he/she be self-weaning?

If your baby has been refusing to chest/breastfeed for several nursing sessions or days in a row, then it’s more likely that you and your little one are experiencing a nursing strike, rather than self-weaning. It is very uncommon for a baby to self-wean before their first birthday. As we have said before, babies need milk to be their primary source of nutrition right up until their first birthday. Also, self-weaning is usually a gradual process, where as a nursing strike is characterized by a sudden and complete disinterest and refusal to chest/breastfeed. Nursing strikes are common in older babies and can be in response to teething, distraction, illness, bottle-preference, and other developmental milestones. Tips for surviving a nursing strike and encouraging baby to nurse again are:

• Always offer breastmilk before any solids during baby’s first year of life. If baby won’t nurse, you can offer baby expressed milk in a sippy cup, to ensure baby’s nutritional needs are being met.

• Limit or eliminate bottles and pacifiers. Only use bottles when baby is separated from you and then put baby back to chest/breast when baby is with you.

• If distractibility seems to be playing a role in baby’s refusal to nurse, try wearing a nursing necklace to keep baby’s attention focused on nursing. You can also try giving baby a small toy to hold during feeding sessions, nursing in a quiet room, and nursing baby in a baby carrier.

If you feel your milk supply has decreased, and this has led to the nursing strike, then it is a good idea to make an appointment with a Lactation Consultant to come up with a chest/breastfeeding plan to help you increase your supply and meet baby’s needs moving forward.

If you’re wondering how breastfeeding will change as your baby becomes more independent, you’re in good company!

Every baby transitions through this stage a little differently, and it’s completely normal to have questions about nursing frequency, distracted feedings, or how breastmilk fits into your little one’s growing diet. Whether you need reassurance, tips for managing changes, or support in meeting your breastfeeding goals, we’re here to guide you every step of the way. Schedule a one-on-one appointment (consider a virtual appointment, if you don’t live in San Diego!) with one of our lactation consultants for personalized care and expert advice tailored to your baby’s unique needs.

SDBFC is committed to providing high-quality lactation and functional nutrition consultations to parents in San Diego and beyond. Explore our postpartum, prenatal, and functional nutrition consultations, take a breastfeeding class or attend a workshop.

 About the Author

Robin Kaplan has been an IBCLC since 2009, the same year that she opened up the San Diego Breastfeeding Center.  Robin was the founding host of the Boob Group podcast and published her first book, Latch: a Handbook for Breastfeeding with Confidence at Every Stage in 2018.  Melding her passions for supporting lactating parents and holistic health, Robin finished her Functional Nutrition Certification in 2023. In her free time, she enjoys hanging out with her two teenage boys, hiking, traveling, weaving, cooking, and searching for the best chai latte.

Nighttime Weaning

Written by Anna Choi, IBCLC

A few months ago, when my youngest daughter was between 15 and 18 months old, I found myself hitting a rough patch in terms of sleep deprivation. After almost a year and half of waking up throughout the night to nurse her back to sleep, I was exhausted and frustrated. “It’s time to night wean,” I told my husband. I had been hoping and hoping she would start sleeping through the night on her own after her first birthday, but it hadn’t happened yet and I was at the end of my rope. I loved the amazing breastfeeding relationship we had built and was nervous to make a change, but knew it was needed.

Talking with a good friend whose breastfed daughter was the same age as my little one, and also not sleeping through the night, reassured me that there was nothing “wrong” about our situation. We agreed though that we were ready for more consistent sleep stretches and began researching gentle night-weaning strategies, thinking we might approach this next big step together so we could support one another through the ups and downs. We spent two months researching and delaying [trying to choose the best time to start – when the littles were not sick or teething, we had a few days off work, not during a trip out of town, etc], and then, as luck would have it, both of our girls began sleeping through the night on their own around 18 months old. How’s that for irony?

Even though I ended up not needing to move forward with a night-weaning strategy, I thought it would be helpful to share what I learned with my fellow sleep-deprived mamas of toddlers, as well as answer some of the most common questions we get as Lactation Consultants regarding nighttime breastfeeding of a toddler over 12 months old.

Why is my 1-2 year old waking at night?

It’s important to remember that there are a variety of reasons your little one may continue to wake throughout the night. These reasons can include hunger, a need for comfort, pain from teething/illness, and external factors such as noise, just to name a few. Even though you may be using breastfeeding as the primary means to settle your toddler back to sleep, it may not be the reason your little one is waking in the first place. If you are able to pinpoint a cause for the night waking [such as your little one being too hot/cold], then you can oftentimes make a simple change [adjust the temperature of their room by using a fan/space heater] to decrease nighttime wake-ups.

What are some options for approaching nighttime weaning?

Once you have addressed outside variables such as room temperature, teething, etc, and feel as though baby primarily needs comfort and assistance transitioning back to sleep during nighttime wake-ups, there are several choices for how to move away from using breastfeeding as the means to settling your toddler back to sleep. These are a few of the gentle nighttime weaning methods and links to more detailed information about each one:

Jay Gordon Technique

This method uses gentle behavior modification by slowly reducing the total time spent breastfeeding at night, while replacing the nighttime nursing sessions with another comfort measure.

http://drjaygordon.com/attachment/sleeppattern.html    

Cues For “Bye-Bye Milk”

Depending on the age of your toddler and their understanding of verbal cues, some mothers find that using a verbal cue [and possibly ASL sign] for the end of a nursing session can help transition baby off the breast more smoothly. Many toddlers already use a sign or word to ask for milk, and this idea flips that routine to the ending of the nursing session. Once your toddler responds well to mommy saying, “bye-bye milk” or “all done milk,” or another phrase that works for you, this technique can usually be transitioned into explaining that when it’s dark, or nighttime, mama’s milk goes night-night too.

http://www.mommypotamus.com/so-you-want-to-night-wean-your-toddler/    

Will my milk supply decrease if I choose to night wean?

The short answer is, yes it probably will. However, for most breastfeeding mothers, the dip in supply will not be drastic enough to cause any adverse effects on the breastfeeding relationship. Now that your little one is a toddler and should be eating plenty of solid foods throughout the day, the small dip in supply will likely go unnoticed. As long as your toddler continues to nurse during the day, you will continue to produce breastmilk for him/her.

General tips for approaching nighttime weaning:

1. Enlist the help of a support person. No matter which path you take, nighttime weaning will involve providing comfort for your toddler in another way besides breastfeeding. Having another adult, whether this is your partner, a grandparent, your best friend, or a postpartum doula, available at night to help provide this comfort and/or support you through this change will be immensely helpful.

2. Create a bedtime routine and stick with it. If you haven’t already, I highly recommend you come up with a simple bedtime routine that you do with your toddler each night. Consistency is important for helping to establish boundaries and teach your little one what to expect during the night. Bedtime routines do not have to be elaborate. Something basic such as: bath, pajamas, story or song time, breastfeeding, toddler laid down in their sleep space, is all it takes.

3. Remember, it doesn’t have to be all or nothing. If your little one is waking multiple times throughout the night, you may wish to focus on eliminating one nighttime breastfeeding session at a time. Taking this slower approach can be helpful for avoiding engorgement as well.

4. If at any time during the night weaning process you have second thoughts or feel as though this isn’t the best decision for you and your family, then stop. You aren’t signing a contract when you embark down this path, and it’s okay to stop the process and wait to start again in a few weeks or a few months. Trust your gut and your mama instincts.

Toddler Nursing Part III - Super Breastfed Baby!

Written by guest blogger, Andrea J. Blanco, IBCLC

My seven year old is really, really into the Super Diaper Baby series. So much so (embarrassing story for which I will pay for dearly in 10 years coming up right now) that the other day, he fished through all the dirty clothes to find 8 (yes, 8!!!!) underwear to put on simultaneously along with a cape so that he could reenact parts of the book. I’m not entirely sure why clean underwear couldn’t be used, but hey, welcome to the gnarly world of 7 year old boys. I’m still getting adjusted.  Anyway, whenever he yells “SUPER DIAPER BABY!!” all I hear is “SUPER BREASTFED BABY!!!” (you better have read that in your booming announcer voice; if not, please go back and reread).

Super Breastfed Baby is not a baby anymore. He’s a toddler who can leap off everything, get all bruised up and bounce right back up. He can run amazing distances while laughing hysterically at you chasing him and fall over 15 times, but who’s counting? He scoffs at the mere thought of you trying to clean. Or sit. Or cook. Or sleep. He knows what he wants and isn’t taking no for an answer. This is the breastfed baby magnified – the one that I was reminded of as I read some of your comments to Toddler Nursing Part I and Toddler Nursing Part II of the Toddler series. Super Breastfed Baby is who we’re going to tackle today.

The Scenario: You and Super Breastfed Baby are home and you are trying to get things done around the house.

I hate to say it, but nothing about this will ever get easy. But it can get easier. Having a child, nursing or otherwise, around the house means being very strategic in all that you do. Your toddler wakes at 7, you say? Well then, 6:15 is the time to set the alarm so you can chop veggies for tonight’s dinner, put a load of laundry in the washer, and prepare a to-do list for your partner. Waking earlier than your little one doesn’t work for you? Try naptime or after bedtime. When they’re awake what they want is to be entertained. By you. Because you’re the awesomest. EVER. And no one else can compare to the way YOU entertain them. And when you aren’t in the entertaining mood? You still have breasts. Which they love. All I keep thinking as I’m typing this paragraph is “That which you resist, persists.”

It’s easy to get caught up feeling like “I HAVE TO DO THIS NOW”, but sometimes, if you stop for a second and give in to Super Breastfed Baby’s demands (of nursing or block building or nursing while block building), you will find that time to do what you were looking to do suddenly appears afterwards. And if it doesn’t appear? And you still have to vacuum? Rip a play out of my dear friend’s book and wear your baby right around naptime. She vacuums the floors, makes the bed, washes the dishes and sometimes even mows the lawn with her toddler strapped to her back in the Ergo. Most times he’s too busy loving the view, but sometimes, her little superhero falls asleep while she’s at it. 

The Scenario: You and Super Breastfed Baby are, well, just home.

You may have noticed that when you’re home or *gasp* sitting down, your normally easy to distract child becomes Mr. Grabby Pants (which definitely feels like a superhero quality), demanding to nurse every. five. minutes. This one is a little trickier to fend off because mommy sitting = easy target. Most toddlers nurse that frequently out of boredom and/or familiarity. If you’re like most moms, for the last year, most of you and your baby’s breastfeeding took place either sitting or laying down. So it just means that your little princess was paying attention and now that she sees you sitting or laying down again, she thinks it’s nursing time. If you have realistic expectations of what’s about to happen, then you may be better prepared to deal with it. Another way to fend off Mr. or Ms. Grabby Pants is to “relax” in a new or exciting (but safe) environment. Toddler areas at local museums or indoor play gyms tend to be enclosed – use that to your advantage. Your busy, curious, newly independent toddler will be much less likely to think of nursing when there’s other stuff to do and see.

The Scenario: You and Super Breastfed Baby are at an impasse and you’re not too sure you want to continue nursing.

You’re trying to set boundaries, but it seems nothing is working. It’s not so much that you want to wean Super Breastfed Baby (or maybe it is), but you would like for nursing to feel like it’s more on your terms than at his demand. First, there is absolutely NOTHING wrong with you feeling that way. Nursing is a mutual relationship – both you and your child have to want to continue. As I mentioned in Part II, if you’re feeling like you want to slow down the demands of nursing or even wean, first try to pinpoint which is the MOST difficult nursing time for you. For me, it wasn’t the morning, nap and night – those I could deal with. But it was all the in-betweens. However, I didn’t realize that I could deal with, and actually cherished, the morning, nap and night until I was able to really cut back on the in-betweens. It took lots of creativity and motion, but after a few weeks, he didn’t even realize the in-betweens were missing. As with any change to a child’s sense of normalcy, employing gentle techniques combined with lots of love and patience along with waiting (if you can) until the child is communicative enough to understand, even if he doesn’t agree, will yield the best results.

The Scenario: You and Super Breastfed Baby have found your groove, but sometimes, she acts like there isn’t enough milk.

Super Breastfed Baby is one smart cookie. Maybe it’s that x-ray vision or her supernatural senses, but something has alerted her that there is less milk. Did you read that sweet momma? LESS MILK. Less milk is different than “NOT ENOUGH” milk. A few months ago, when you started solids because your little one showed all the signs of being ready, the weaning process began. Your body naturally slowed down its milk production to meet your baby’s needs and has continued to be super efficient in adjusting to those continued needs. Yes, you do have less milk, but, in conjunction with the other foods he’s eating, he’s still getting exactly what he needs. In addition, Super Breastfed Baby knows what he’s doing when he seems to be kneading the breast or trying to “play” with the other nipple. He’s actually trying to elicit a faster flow of milk for himself. For most moms, the kneading is nowhere near as exasperating as the nipple twiddling. Toddlers need to learn manners, too, and where better to learn them then at the breast where they are happy and relaxed and met with love? If you’re trying to curb behaviors such as nipple twiddling, be consistent each time. Explain to your toddler that it hurts momma. Use words she can understand. And repeat each and every time. Sometimes, along with consistency, a little bargaining might help, too. “Instead of hurting mommy by touching my breast that way, you can [insert substitutive, less exasperating behavior here]”.

So many of my past New Year’s Eves were spent with a baby in arms, or in a sling, or on the breast, picking confetti (or food) out of their beautiful, thick brown hair. Some years, it seemed I would never have my body free at midnight – or ever. My Super Breastfed Babies are babies no more…I can’t even say they are in jest. This year, we weren’t nursing at midnight. I wasn’t holding them. Yet, there we were, all of us snuggled up and interlocked when the clock struck 12. Maybe not as it had been in years past, but then again, not much different either. Maybe it was because, as others would say, I “nursed them *forever*”. Or maybe it’s because, through the nursing process, I realized there’s nowhere else I’d rather be.

Happy New Year! 

Andrea Blanco is an International Board Certified Lactation Consultant at The Milk Collective Lactation Care, working with families in the Miami/Ft. Lauderdale area. She is the proud mom of 2 loving, spirited boys, who teach her humility, patience, humor, and the rules to more sports than she thought she’d need to know every day. When she’s not helping families achieve their breastfeeding goals, you can find her on the sidelines, at karate tournaments, or with her toes in the sand. She can also be found at themilkcollective.co, on Instagram @themilkcollective_ , facebook.com/themilkcollectivelactation or by email at: andrea@themilkcollective.co.

Do you have any additional questions for Andrea about nursing a toddler?  Share them in the comment section and we'll ask her to write another article!

Gentle Weaning: Techniques and Resources

In this third article in our Gentle Weaning series, we will start the conversation about different techniques you can try to gently wean your baby.  If you are wondering about how to pace the weaning process, check out our last article, Gentle Weaning: What is the Process?

Every breastfeeding mother eventually weans her child.  It is part of the evolutionary process.  Whether your baby is a few months old or a preschool-age child, there comes a time when the act of breastfeeding no longer occurs.   When the time is right for both you and your child to wean, there are quite a few techniques you can use to help make the process go more smoothly. 

 I have searched books and the Internet to find some of the best resources out there.  I would love if you would please share your own resources and experiences, as well, so that we can all benefit from them!

 Techniques for Gently Weaning your Breastfed Child

Choose one feeding per day to replace with something else.  If your child is not on solid foods yet, then this would have to be some other nutritionally-based liquid.  Consider using previously pumped milk, or donor milk, in a bottle or cup.  If you child is eating solids, replace this breastfeeding session with fruits, vegetables, protein, grains, etc.  Fill a cup with water, pumped milk, or another nutritional liquid to help keep your child hydrated.

When you replace this feeding session, don’t stimulate your breasts at that time.  Skipping this nursing session should help to slowly decrease your milk supply, without the discomfort of engorgement.  After a week or two of skipping that nursing session once a day, choose another feeding to drop.  Continue this process until you have completed weaned.  This process may take weeks or months…. It is completely up to you. 

Don’t offer, don’t refuse.  This gentle weaning technique is more appropriate for an older child, rather than an infant.  What it means is that you don’t offer to nurse your child unless he/she asks to nurse.  This process may take longer than the other, as your child is never denied a chance to nurse if he/she needs to or wants to breastfeed. 

Save naptime and bedtime as the last feeding sessions to wean.  Bedtime and naptime are often the most difficult nursing sessions to end for both emotional and convenience reasons.  Save these for last.  Attempt to drop all of the other feedings first before you attempt those associated with naptime and bedtime. 

Create a new routine.  If you and your child like to nurse before a nap or bedtime, replace this nursing session with another routine.  Here are a few ideas:

Have your partner put your child to bed

Read your child a story

Sing to your child and relax in a rocking chair or bed (somewhere that is a different location than where you nursed before.)

If your child is old enough, ask him/her to choose what he/she would like to do instead.

Distract your child or offer something else.  If you can anticipate that your child is going to want to nurse at a certain time, offer him/her something else to do.  Kellymom.com recommends distracting with a favorite snack, a playdate with a friend, playing outside, or reading a favorite book as a few ideas.

Attempt nighttime weaning and daytime weaning at different times.  Trying to daytime wean and nighttime wean at the same time can be extremely overwhelming.  It’s best to choose one or the other and start there.  Kellymom.com has some terrific suggestions for ways to nighttime wean.

Celebrate your breastfeeding accomplishments at the end.  Weaning can be a very emotional process for both mother and child.  I remember my last nursing session with my son like it was yesterday.  We had this cozy, green rocking chair in his bedroom and I just sat there, rocking his soundly sleeping body in my arms, for about an hour after he finished nursing that last time.  I reflected upon the breastfeeding challenges we had overcome and the joy it had brought to the both of us.   I felt so blessed to have shared those moments with my sweet boy.

Now, this is NOT an exhaustive list of techniques to help you gently wean your child…not in the least.  Here are a few of my favorite blog posts about this topic:

Natural Parents Network: Gently Weaning a Preschooler

PhD in Parenting: A Different Kind of Baby-Led Weaning

San Diego Breastfeeding Center: Our Breastfeeding Memoirs, Chapter Two

What is Weaning and When Should I Wean my Baby?

Weaning is a very personal and emotional topic for all breastfeeding moms.  My personal experience with weaning my two boys was not what I expected nor anticipated.  As my milk started to dwindle when my boys turned three months, I didn’t have the breastfeeding support or knowledge I needed to ramp up my supply.  At that time, I was not a lactation consultant.  Instead I was a full-time working mom, breastfeeding while with my son and pumping, 2 times a day, while at work. 

I was devastated that my milk supply was ‘failing’ me, but I did the best I could to eek it out as long as I could.  I made it to 7 months with my first son and to 8 months with my second son.  I had hoped to breastfeed until my boys were at least a year, but my body had another plan in mind.  I weaned as slowly as I could, for I didn’t want to let go of breastfeeding completely.  The emotional tie was too great for me to let go of.

So, what is weaning?  What does it really mean?

Some women feel that anytime the baby is sucking on something other than a breast, it is considered weaning (i.e., pacifier, bottle, complementary foods starting after 6 months).  However, in the United States, I would say that most women consider weaning to be when a mother begins to breastfeed less, with the end result being that she is no longer breastfeeding.

How do you know when to start weaning?  Is there a right time to wean?

This is a very personal decision – one which mom, partner, and baby need to figure out on their own.  I recommend to all of the pregnant mothers I work with to talk with their partners about what their goals are for breastfeeding, prenatally.  How long would they like to try to breastfeed for?  This is not something that should be influenced by family members, friends, in-laws, media, etc.  Everyone has an opinion about breastfeeding duration, but no one’s opinion is truly that important as the mother’s, partner’s, and the eventual baby.  Once this decision is made, this is now your minimum goal.  If you reach your goal and you and your baby want to continue, then keep going!  If you reach this goal and are ready to wean, then you can be incredibly proud of yourself that you met this wonderful goal of breastfeeding your baby. 

Sometimes, a woman’s body begins to produce less milk, as in my situation, before she and her baby are ready to wean.  This is definitely a time to seek out the help of a lactation consultant.  Knowing what I know now, there are quite a few ways that I may have been able to increase my supply, to help me meet that goal of breastfeeding my boys for a full year.  It is all about support and knowledge.

When a mother doesn’t feel pressure to wean her baby, her baby would most likely breastfeed for at least 2 years.  This is very biological.  Remember, breastfeeding is not only something that is done for the nutritional value, but also for comfort and illness protection. 

So, what is a good process for gentle weaning? 

What are some helpful techniques, which take into account the needs of you and your baby?

Gentle Weaning: What is the Process?

In this second article in our Weaning series, we will start the conversation about how to gently wean your baby and why pacing is so important in this process.  If you are wondering when you will know when to begin weaning your child, check out our last article, What is Weaning and When Should I Wean my Baby?

At what pace should you wean your child?

Very slowly.  The weaning process can take several months, as you want to make sure that both you and your child are adapting well to this new pattern of breastfeeding.  Drop one feeding at a time (for example, from 6 times a day to 5 times a day) and try this out for a week or two. This will give your breasts time to acclimate and hopefully not become too engorged.  This will also allow your child to get used to doing something else, or get his/her nutrition from another source at this time.

This process will most likely take a month to several months; depending on how many times your child is breastfeeding in a 24 hour period.  Remember, weaning can affect you and your child physically and emotionally, so it is best to take your time and wean very slowly.

What are the risks for abruptly weaning?

It is very rare that a mother would have to abruptly wean her child from breastfeeding.  The risks associated with abrupt weaning for the mother could be:

• Breast pain

• Engorgement

• Mastitis

• Breast abscess

There are also risks associated with abrupt weaning for the child.  Remember, breastfeeding is not only a source of nutrition for your child, but also a sense of comfort and bonding.  To suddenly remove this could be very confusing and scary for your child, especially if he/she is still developing his/her sense of attachment and trust.  As with all methods of parenting, it is most respectful and effective to initiate change at a slow pace.

What physical and emotional changes should a mother expect when weaning?

All rights reserved, Susanne Klein photographeAs you begin to drop a breastfeeding session during the weaning process, you may feel fullness in your breasts, which can become uncomfortable.  Here are a few tricks to relieve that fullness:

• Pump or hand express, just to relieve the fullness.  Don’t pump to drain or you just defeated the whole purpose of skipping that breastfeeding session.

• Take a hot shower, which will help you leak a little and may reduce the pressure in your breast.

• Cabbage leaf compresses – good old green cabbage wrapped around your breasts can help to reduce fullness.

• Sage tea – drink sparingly while gently weaning, as it can really tank a milk supply when consumed in large quantities.

Emotionally, your body is going to go through some hormonal changes as you begin to wean.  During the weaning process, prolactin levels begin to drop.  Prolactin not only helps to stimulate your milk supply, but it also provides a sense of relaxation and calmness.  Some mothers may even feel depression after weaning. 

I remember feeling a sense of loss, that I had a difficult time describing, as I was weaning my son.  It was somewhat temporary, but it definitely was there.  I just felt sad that this aspect of mothering and comforting my child was coming to an end.  Something that helped me adapt to this change was creating a different bedtime routine for the two of us.  Instead of nursing my son to sleep, we now read a story together in his rocking chair.  Then, I turned off the light and sang him a song as I rocked him into a state of sleepiness.  My son is now five years old.  At bedtime, we still read a story in his bed and then listen to a song on his IPod as I lie down next to him and snuggle.  It is my favorite time of the day!

Now it’s your turn to share how you paced your weaning process with your child. 

How long did it take you to wean? 

What physical and/or emotional changes did you encounter?