Weaning Robin Kaplan Weaning Robin Kaplan

A Farewell to Na-Na: When It's Time to Wean

Wondering if it’s time to wean? Read this post from guest blogger Jessica Lang Kosa to learn more about the weaning process - and the many feelings it can bring up.

Written by guest blogger, Jessica Lang Kosa

My youngest is weaning. Most people assume she has long since stopped nursing, since she goes to preschool, eats everything, and has sleepovers with the grandparents.   She still usually nurses at bedtime, but sometimes forgets to ask.  Occasionally she'll drift off, and then bolt up, announcing "bedtime nana!"  She seems to be on roughly the same timetable as her older brother and sister, so I suspect she'll forget more and more often, and be weaned altogether in a few months.

Mostly, I'll be glad. My milk supply is now very low, so nursing can feel annoying sometimes. And in our household, weaning is a right of passage marked by a family celebration…. with balloons and favorite foods.  It's kind of her first graduation party.

Like all my kids' milestones, it will also be bittersweet.  I will miss the potent mothering tool that toddler nursing has been, and I will miss this part of her life.

I'll miss the magic ability to calm an overtired kiddo and stop a tantrum; from meltdown to melting-in-my-lap with the flip of a breast.

I’ll miss the intense physicality of the nursing connection, and the way it relaxes both of us.  Coming home from work used to trigger a demand of “nana on couch!” I’d sit right down on the sofa to nurse her, reconnecting first thing, rather than getting swept into the flurry of household activity.

I’ll miss nana-as-medicine.  'Tis the season for colds and bugs.  Preschool germs have been so much more manageable since I could nurse her through them when she didn't feel like eating or drinking.

I won't particularly miss some of the boundary negotiations, but I'm glad we had them. Learning as a toddler that it’s not OK to strip-search mommy is a great introduction to personal space.  It's been a opportunity to teach that critical concept: other people, even mommy, have feelings.  Someday, when she's a young woman in a relationship, I hope her subconscious will remember my gentle limit-setting and guide her towards taking care of herself while loving someone else.

Since she's my third, I know how fast they grow up.  At preschool, she has friends her own age and a cubby and art projects with her name on them.  She helps make her own lunch, and proudly packs it in her backpack. As she discovers the outside world, with all its glory and its hazards, I will cheer her on, but miss the simplicity of her time as a baby.  She’s a long way from the tiny infant I used to tote around with me, but nursing allowed me to see and feed the baby inside her.  Watching her outgrow nursing in her own time has been a privilege.  Weaning has been a microcosm of holding on while letting go.

Jessica Lang Kosa is an IBCLC, providing in-home lactation consulting for families in Greater Boston, and breastfeeding education for professionals around New England.  

Connect with her at:

http://motherfeeding.com

http://www.facebook.com/motherfeeding

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Chest/Breastfeeding Robin Kaplan Chest/Breastfeeding Robin Kaplan

Common Concerns - Do I Have Mastitis?

Welcome to our blog series…. Common Concerns While Breastfeeding.  These aren’t the complicated, ‘come-to-my-house-immediately’ phone calls I receive.  Rather, these are the questions that come from clients and friends in the middle of the night, by text or by email, that don’t necessarily warrant a lactation consultation.  They can often be easily resolved with a few simple tricks.  So, I would like to share those tricks with you!

Why is my breast so swollen???

Does your breast suddenly feel like it is going to explode, like a balloon, off of your chest?  Does it hurt to breastfeed, yet you know you have to remove your milk ASAP?  Are you starting to feel exhausted and lethargic... not something that can just be blamed on being a new mom?  Sounds like you may have mastitis!

What is mastitis?

Welcome to our blog series…. Common Concerns While Breastfeeding.  These aren’t the complicated, ‘come-to-my-house-immediately’ phone calls I receive.  Rather, these are the questions that come from clients and friends in the middle of the night, by text or by email, that don’t necessarily warrant a lactation consultation.  They can often be easily resolved with a few simple tricks.  So, I would like to share those tricks with you!

Why is my breast so swollen???

Does your breast suddenly feel like it is going to explode, like a balloon, off of your chest?  Does it hurt to breastfeed, yet you know you have to remove your milk ASAP?  Are you starting to feel exhausted and lethargic... not something that can just be blamed on being a new mom?  Sounds like you may have mastitis!

What is mastitis?

Mastitis is inflammation of the breast, usually (although not always) from a bacterial infection.  Mastitis happens when milk gets stuck in the milk ducts and that milk stasis  causes engorgement and inflammation.  Not all mastitis is an infection of the breast and can often be treated with natural remedies.  Indications of an infection, and the need for antibiotics, are:

  • Mastitis in both breasts

  • Baby is less than 2 weeks old or you were just hospitalized

  • Nipple has obvious infection

  • Pus/blood in the milk

  • Red streaking is present

  • Temperature increases suddenly

  • Symptoms are sudden and severe

(per Kellymom, Plugged Ducts and Mastitis)

 

How will I know if I have mastitis?

Mastitis often starts as a plugged duct.  This pesky blockage starts to get harder and more painful over a few hours as the milk stays 'stuck' in the milk duct.  As with a plugged duct, mastitis typically affects one breast, rather than both.  Plugged ducts often resolve within a few hours to a few days, and while uncomfortable and tender, they are relieved with a few comfort measures over time. 

Mastitis, on the other hand, has a few additional symptoms:

  • Painful, hot area on the breast

  • Breast may have a red streak over the hardened area

  • Breast looks swollen and the affected area is tight and uncomfortable

  • Mom feels like she has the flu - extreme exhaustion, achy, chills

 

How can I treat mastitis?

Once you start feeling like your plugged duct is exacerbating into mastitis, you want to start treating it as quickly as possible.  Mastitis can often be treated with many natural remedies, rather than needing antibiotics.  The reason we want to leave antibiotics as a last resort is that they kill off both the bad bacteria, as well as the good bacteria, leaving your body wide open for increasing your risk for thrush... Huge bummer!

Here is a list of my personal favorite natural remedies for treating mastitis:

  • Bed rest! This is your body's way of telling you it's time to rest and take care of yourself. Think of yourself as having the flu. While mastitis is not contagious, you definitely need to remove your milk and feed your baby. The best way to do this is to spend the rest of your day in bed.

  • Fluids and nourishment. Drink lots of fluids (like water, coconut water, and green smoothies) and eat warm nourishing meals (like soup.) The laundry can wait, I promise!

  • Remove milk every 2-3 hours. If it hurts too much to breastfeed on the side with mastitis, you will need to pump instead.

  • Castor oil compresses - Castor oil used topically helps to move things under the skin. Pour castor oil on a face cloth (it stains, so not on a nice one) and place the face cloth on your sore breast. Place a heating pad over the face cloth, as the heat will help the body absorb the castor oil and move the blockage. Check every 20 minutes and use as long as it takes to soften your breast.

  • Dandelion tincture. Dandelion is a natural antibiotic and a great way to battle any infection. Two droppers full, 3-4 times a day, can often do the trick. The flavor is definitely intense, but well worth it!

  • Vitamin C and Echinacea. Mastitis is your body's way of telling you it's time to slow down. Both vitamin C and Echinacea boost your body's immune system. A safe dose to take is 3000-5000mg/day (mega dose to be used acutely during mastitis) of Vitamin C and 900mg of Echinacea per day (acutely).

  • Homeopathic belladonna. These tiny little pellets can make a world of difference to reduce your temperature while battling mastitis. Plus, you cannot overdose on homeopathy... if it isn't working, then you just stop taking it. 2-3 pellets, under the tongue, every 30 minutes for up to 6 hours.

 

How can I prevent mastitis?

Once you get mastitis, you definitely never want to get it again, so how can you prevent it from happening even in the first place?

Ways to prevent mastitis:

  • Effective and frequent removal of milk. Engorgement or ineffective removal of milk can cause your milk to get backed up in the ductal system, causing inflammation and mastitis. Tongue-ties, latching problems, oversupply, limiting baby's time at breast, nipple shields, sleepy baby, and skipped feedings can all decrease the baby's effectiveness at breast, thereby allowing the breast to fill up too much.

  • Make sure certain areas of your breast are not being constricted. Tight, under wire bras and restrictive clothing can put undo pressure on a particular area of your breast, which may cause a plugged duct.

  • Seek help ASAP when you have cracked or bleeding nipples, as these wounds increase your risk for infection.

  • Support your immune system. Having a new baby can be draining on your body and immune system, especially if you are recovering from an exhausting birth, cesarean, or just too many visitors in your space. In many cultures, new moms don't leave their homes for 6 weeks and their family and friends cook all of her meals and help her take care of her new baby. Unfortunately, in the United States, that is simply not the norm. When our immune system is run down, we are much more susceptible to illness and inflammation. Limit visitors in the first few weeks to only HELPFUL visitors, and ask them to bring food. Relax and rest during and in between breastfeeding sessions to let your body heal after the birth. Eat warm, nourishing foods to keep your blood flowing and your body healthy. Take an Omega 3 supplement (from a reputable company, like Nordic Naturals) to reduce inflammation.

 

Disclaimer: Most herbal treatments have not been thoroughly researched, particularly in regard to lactation. Herbs are drugs, and some caution is necessary. I am presenting this data as is, without any warranty of any kind, express or implied, and am not liable for its accuracy nor for any loss or damage caused by a user’s reliance on this information.

 

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Pumping Robin Kaplan Pumping Robin Kaplan

Breastfeeding and Going Back to Work: Roundup

With so many of my friends and breastfeeding support group mamas going back to work by the end of the year, I thought I would do a round-up of my favorite Going Back to Workarticles (written by me, as well as some of my colleagues.)

Here's what you'll find on the San Diego Breastfeeding Center website:

Hi ho, Hi ho, It's Off to Work We Go: Part 1 - Starting the pumping and bottle feeding routine.

Hi ho, Hi ho, It's Off to Work We Go: Part 2 - Making plans with your employer and your rights as a breastfeeding/pumping/working mom.

How Long Does my Breast Milk Stay Fresh? - Take the guesswork out of how long your pumped milk stays fresh.  Here are all of the answers you'll need.

Help!  I am Going Back to Work and My Baby Won't Take a Bottle! - Top 10 tricks to get your little one to take a bottle before you return to work.

So, You’re Going Back to Work - one of my favorite memoirs from a local breastfeeding, working mom!

Now that you've perused all of our articles (and I can guarantee there are more waiting to be written over the upcoming months), here are a few of my favorite resources beyond our web site:

United States Breastfeeding Committee - FAQ's: Break Time for Nursing Mothers

Kellymom - Links: Working and Pumping Tips

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Chest/Breastfeeding Robin Kaplan Chest/Breastfeeding Robin Kaplan

Toddler Nursing Part II – Toddler vs. Breastfeeding

Written by guest blogger, Andrea J. Blanco, IBCLC

Have you ever read Dinosaur vs. Bedtime by Bob Shea?

“ROAR!! I’m a dinosaur! ROAR! NOTHING CAN STOP ME!”

It’s a cute little book about this dinosaur who faces many challenges, and wins all but one. The dinosaur is FOR SURE a toddler. I just know it.

In my previous post, we talked about some of the reasons why nursing a toddler can be a helpful transition for you and your little one. Dealing with a little person who has so many changes going on all at once can feel a lot like those battles in Dinosaur vs. Bedtime. Here are some suggestions for turning the tables on your little dinosaur or dinosaurette.

I want to keep nursing, but am being pressured to quit.

Written by guest blogger, Andrea J. Blanco, IBCLC

Have you ever read Dinosaur vs. Bedtime by Bob Shea?

“ROAR!! I’m a dinosaur! ROAR! NOTHING CAN STOP ME!”

It’s a cute little book about this dinosaur who faces many challenges, and wins all but one. The dinosaur is FOR SURE a toddler. I just know it.

In my previous post, we talked about some of the reasons why nursing a toddler can be a helpful transition for you and your little one. Dealing with a little person who has so many changes going on all at once can feel a lot like those battles in Dinosaur vs. Bedtime. Here are some suggestions for turning the tables on your little dinosaur or dinosaurette.

I want to keep nursing, but am being pressured to quit.

In this society, if you happen to be nursing your 3 month old, you are in the minority. Six months? You are an anomaly. If you’ve gotten to the point where you’re thinking of nursing your toddler, then it is safe to assume that not everyone around you will understand or agree that you are doing a very important, *normal* thing. However, dealing with that lack of support is crucial to your wellbeing and to the likely continuation of your breastfeeding relationship. So what can you do if the people closest to you don’t necessarily share your same enthusiasm?

First, have a conversation about their concerns. Be a good listener and find out why continued nursing is bothersome for them. It’s rarely about YOU nursing YOUR toddler that is offensive to them and has to do with other concerns, like spending time with you (in the case of a partner) or spending time with the baby (in the case of extended family) or concerns (real or perceived) over your work duties (in the case of an employer). If you’re able to get to the real issue for which breastfeeding is taking the hit, making small changes to show you are conscientious of their concerns will get the attention off the nursing and you and your toddler can continue your breastfeeding relationship.

 

There are times when despite your best efforts, it will feel like a lonely journey. However, in this day and age, that needn’t be the case. A lot of communities offer breastfeeding support groups and even breastfeeding toddler groups. Check with your local hospital or La Leche League chapter to see if there are any in your area. When my first was approaching toddlerhood, I found my support through online forums where I met some great, like-minded mommas whose virtual support was key to our continued breastfeeding success. If you’re on Facebook, become a member of one of the many groups there are offering mother-to-mother support. Are you on Twitter? Search #breastfeeding and for the most part, you’ll be met with tons of virtual kindness. What about downloading some great podcasts from The Boob Group? You don’t need an army of people cheering your name – sometimes one person who gets what you are going through is enough. Toddler Nursing vs. the World? Toddler Nursing WINS!

My toddler is very demanding about wanting to nurse, even when I don’t want to.

As you’ve probably realized, toddlers are VERY demanding about EVERYTHING. Nursing will definitely not be excluded. It’s easy to continue to fall into this routine of “on-demand” nursing when you’ve been at it for so long, but with your child’s developing language comes the understanding that we live in a world where patience and manners are necessary and there are boundaries. While breastfeeding does still serve a nutritional purpose in that second year of life, it probably isn’t what your toddler is surviving on alone. In the same way that you are curbing the throwing of sippy cups on the floor so hard that the top comes off and the water (if you’re lucky, it’s just water!) spills everywhere, you can begin to curb the octopus arms toddlers suddenly develop when trying to get to the breast. Model the behavior you wish to see and be gentle, but firm about it (laughing or smiling and cooing at how cute it is that your little one grabs at your shirt and pulls so hard while yelling for some milkies when you’re trying to say no isn’t very effective). Octopus Hands vs. Nursing Manners? Nursing Manners WIN!

But, what if I’m out and my toddler still wants to nurse?

Maybe nursing a baby in public has been a challenge for you. If so, then the idea of nursing a toddler in public is really intimidating. Because toddlers are all about exploring the world around them, they are [generally] easy to distract when you’re out. There was, however, that one time at mass when my little angel decided that the crayons and snacks I’d brought along weren’t going to cut it. Nothing like hearing “BOOOOOBIEEEEEE” being yelled out in a quiet room built to echo. As mortified as I may have been at the moment, it’s also one of my most cherished memories. If distraction isn’t working, with a little quick thinking, there’s always a quiet place you and your little one can go for that needed pit stop, breastfeeding under the choir robes included. Also, while you are aware you’re nursing a toddler, most people wouldn’t even think of it, so just as in the case of a baby, to a passerby, it can look like your child is sleeping on your lap, and nothing else (this, of course, doesn’t apply if your son has already announced his plans to the entire congregation). Boobie vs. Echo? Boobie WINS!

When all else fails, don’t forget – you can set boundaries. It doesn’t have to be all or nothing. I’ve dealt with countless clients who, by the time their child gets to a certain age, are having a hard time continuing the nursing relationship because of these demanding moments. If you are at your wit’s end and feel like you want to keep nursing but…, try to find a middle ground. If you are able to target the most stressful times and/or nursing behaviors, you can then find ways to work around them. Maybe that means finding gentle ways to say no by way of distraction more often than you are used to, but if it goes hand in hand with keeping your sanity and in turn, continuing your nursing relationship, then, whether your toddler agrees with you at the particular moment or not, it’s still a win/win situation. Demanding Toddler vs. Boundaries? Boundaries WIN!

 

Nursing a toddler, like having a toddler, isn’t always easy, but if you so happen to embark on the journey, you may find it is always worth it. It gives you another mothering tool to help navigate those battlefield moments and is a sure fire way to connect with your child amidst this busy life we lead. One day my little one got his finger caught in the door and came wobbling over to me, tears of pain streaming down his soft, round toddler cheeks. Instinctively, I lowered my shirt and offered the breast. The older one, worried about his brother, came over and said to him “You see, B? There is love in there so you’ll be ok.” I realized the only reason he felt that way was because of what he experienced at the breast by way of watching and doing. I couldn’t have asked for a bigger reward from my nursing relationships. Toddler vs. Breastfeeding? Love always wins. 

 

Andrea Blanco is an International Board Certified Lactation Consultant at The Milk Collective Lactation Care, working with families in the Miami/Ft. Lauderdale area. She is the proud mom of 2 loving, spirited boys, who teach her humility, patience, humor, and the rules to more sports than she thought she’d need to know every day. When she’s not helping families achieve their breastfeeding goals, you can find her on the sidelines, at karate tournaments, or with her toes in the sand. She can also be found at themilkcollective.co, on Instagram @themilkcollective_ , facebook.com/themilkcollectivelactation or by email at: andrea@themilkcollective.co.

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Breastfeeding with Hypoplasia

Today, on the San Diego Breastfeeding Center blog, I'm honored to share Fakiha Khan's memoir about her battle with Insufficient Glandular Tissue.  If you would like to submit your story as well, please email me at robinkaplan@sdbfc.com.  Thank you so much, Fakiha, for sharing your story with us!  It's stories like yours that make me want to be the best mom I can be! 

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When my son was born 2 and 1/2 years ago, I wanted nothing more than to be able to breastfeed him.  He was in the NICU for a week after he was born, and I really did not get to nurse him until he was a week old.  By that point, he had trouble latching on, and my milk just was not coming in.  For the next five weeks, I did what I could.  I tried to nurse him every hour and a half, I pumped, I took herbs, and I finally went to see a lactation consultant. 

Today, on the San Diego Breastfeeding Center blog, I'm honored to share Fakiha Khan's memoir about her battle with Insufficient Glandular Tissue.  If you would like to submit your story as well, please email me at robinkaplan@sdbfc.com.  Thank you so much, Fakiha, for sharing your story with us!  It's stories like yours that make me want to be the best mom I can be! 

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When my son was born 2 and 1/2 years ago, I wanted nothing more than to be able to breastfeed him.  He was in the NICU for a week after he was born, and I really did not get to nurse him until he was a week old.  By that point, he had trouble latching on, and my milk just was not coming in.  For the next five weeks, I did what I could.  I tried to nurse him every hour and a half, I pumped, I took herbs, and I finally went to see a lactation consultant. 

 

I will never forget how shocked she was that my son transferred only 1/2 an ounce at the age of five weeks.  Other than telling me to continue pumping with a hospital grade pump, the consultant had no other ideas of why I was not producing milk.  She kept saying to me - it is the most natural thing to produce milk.  It's all about demand and supply.  If you keep putting him on your breast, the milk will come. Well, I kept trying, and after weeks of emotional torture and physical discomfort, I finally gave up.  I was producing an ounce of milk from both breasts at that point.  And, giving up was not easy.  I felt like a complete failure, like I could not do the thing that is supposed to be so natural. 

 

I got a second chance when my daughter was born two months ago.  I figured that, with my son, I just didn't get started on nursing quickly enough.  This time, I decided to be proactive even before the baby was born.  I talked to people and a lactation consultant prior to giving birth.  This consultant suggested that I might have a physiological problem such as hypoplasia, but I would not know until I got checked out.  I didn't get a chance to do so before I gave birth, but I went into the birth with hope of doing better this time. 

 

When the baby was born, I immediately put her on my chest and I nursed her within a half hour of birth; I kept her with me nonstop, nursing her whenever I could.  But, within the first two days, it was clear that I was not even making enough colostrum.  I had to give her some formula.  My fuller colostrum finally came in at day 3 and the milk first came in on day 5.  But, despite nursing every hour and a half, the baby was still fussing and clearly unsatisfied. 

 

Those old feelings of frustration and failure came rushing back to me.  I kept thinking, this is supposed to be so natural.  Every mammal mother makes milk for her child, yet, I can't feed my baby who is trying so hard to get out a few drops of milk from me.  All of the instructions from the breastfeeding class kept repeating in my head.  I kept thinking, maybe today I will suddenly make the milk my baby needs, maybe today.   

 

Before giving up, I went to see my doctor to find out if I had hypoplasia.  The doctor told me that hypoplasia was not possible, as I did not have the physical signs (tubular breasts that are set far apart) and because I was making some milk even if it was only an ounce at a time.  So, I thought, ok, there has to be something I can do.  So, I did some research and found out about fenugreek.  I began taking that, and immediately I got a boost in my milk supply.  But, then within a week, it started going back down again.  At this point, I was ready to scream, but before giving up, I decided to consult another lactation consultant.

 

As it happened to be, this consultant specialized in low milk supply.  She finally told me what I had been suspecting - I have insufficient glandular tissue.  The consultant suggested a number of herbs and medication, all of which I tried.  Again, my milk supply went up very quickly, but now after 3 weeks, I see it going back down again.  I still don't know if any of the medications or herbs (which I understand work by increasing hormone levels) really work with insufficient glandular tissue.  Can they create tissue where none exists?  No one can seem to answer this question for me. 

 

Now, I continue pumping during the day, saving the little bit of milk I made (about an ounce and half), and mixing it with formula.  I nurse when I can and regularly throughout the night.  But, I have resolved myself to the fact that I will not be able to exclusively rely on breast milk.  It's a very sad realization, and I wish I had a solution, something to fix this problem, or even a bit more information.  Alas, I do the only thing I can and, in the process, laugh at myself when I am proudly toting home the four-ounces of breast milk I take home after pumping 3 to 4 times at work.  To a regular breastfeeding mom, four ounces is probably how much she produces in one feeding.  For me, it's a day-long effort, and at the end of the day, I carry it home with the same pride as if I had just discovered gold!

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Reminiscing About My Son's Birth

As I rested with my son, Ryan, tonight, I told him the story of the day he was born, exactly 6 years ago.  How he entered this world so peacefully and beautifully and how grateful I am that he is my son.  My eyes filled up with tears as I hugged his sweet little body, my heart feeling like it would explode right out of my chest.  There are no words to fully describe the way I love this little guy and his birth was just the beginning.

6 years and 9 months ago, I found out that I was pregnant with my soon-to-be Ryan.  Ben was 7 months old and I had just returned to work full time.  Let’s just say that SHOCKED cannot even begin to describe how I felt when that little stick had two lines.  We knew we wanted to have at least 2 children, but never thought it would happen this soon!  Feelings of guilt filled my heart as I thought about how I had robbed Ben of months where he would be an only child.  Panic set in when I counted how many months apart my kids would be (15!!!)  How would I tell my boss?  How would I tell my parents?  Most importantly, how would it be possible for me to love another human being as much as I loved my 7-month-old Ben?  I just wasn’t ready!

As I rested with my son, Ryan, tonight, I told him the story of the day he was born, exactly 6 years ago.  How he entered this world so peacefully and beautifully and how grateful I am that he is my son.  My eyes filled up with tears as I hugged his sweet little body, my heart feeling like it would explode right out of my chest.  There are no words to fully describe the way I love this little guy and his birth was just the beginning.

6 years and 9 months ago, I found out that I was pregnant with my soon-to-be Ryan.  Ben was 7 months old and I had just returned to work full time.  Let’s just say that SHOCKED cannot even begin to describe how I felt when that little stick had two lines.  We knew we wanted to have at least 2 children, but never thought it would happen this soon!  Feelings of guilt filled my heart as I thought about how I had robbed Ben of months where he would be an only child.  Panic set in when I counted how many months apart my kids would be (15!!!)  How would I tell my boss?  How would I tell my parents?  Most importantly, how would it be possible for me to love another human being as much as I loved my 7-month-old Ben?  I just wasn’t ready!

 

As the months flew by, I slowly became connected to my growing baby.  I felt his movements much more quickly than I had with Ben and I loved how my stomach would contort and expand during the staff meetings at work.  I wasn’t quite as sick while pregnant this second time around, which was a blessing since I had Ben to contend with as well.  I still wondered how it would be humanly possible for me to connect with this new baby as I had with Ben.

 

 

About 3 days before Ryan was born, I woke up around 6am with this very weird feeling, like something was wrong.  I pushed on my belly to stir the little one, but didn’t feel any movement.  For 30 minutes I rolled from side to side in my bed, walked around from room to room (praying I didn’t wake up 15-month-old Ben), and drank a glass of water.  I still didn’t feel any movement.  I decided to wake up my husband, Jason, and instantaneously broke out in hysterical tears. I hadn’t felt Ryan move in over 45 minutes and I wanted to go to the hospital immediately!  I cried the whole way there, trying to talk myself out of thinking the worse, but I just couldn’t.  We ran into the hospital and begged them to hook me up to see if anything was wrong.  Within minutes, we were in triage, strapped to a monitor and saw to our relief that our baby boy was just sleeping soundly.  I drank some orange juice and he started to stir.  It was one of the scariest moments in my life and as we drove home, I hugged my belly and told him I would be waiting patiently for him, whenever he was ready to arrive.

 

Three days later, after a gorgeous evening walk, pizza dinner, and a little vino, I was awoken from my semi-deep sleep to some mild abdominal cramping.  I checked my clock and started to feel some excitement as the cramping continued to surge every 10 minutes.  After an hour, I woke up my husband to tell him that I was having contractions and that they were starting to get pretty regular.  Now, this was the first time I had felt contractions like this, as I was induced with Ben and never felt the growing, consistent surging I was feeling now.  As I rolled out of bed, the contractions started to become even stronger and jumped to about every 6 minutes.  We immediately called my step-mom, as she was going to watch Ben, and left for the hospital as soon as she arrived.

 

The drive to the hospital was pretty horrible, as I was bent over with my head between my legs, trying to breathe… I am not one who can handle pain very well!  The check-in at the hospital was a blur, as all I wanted to do was get into my room and the walk down that hospital corridor seemed like a 10K, as I paused every few steps to grab my pulsating belly.  By now it was 3am.  My mom and mother-in-law joined us in the labor/delivery room.  My mom began to massage my legs as I breathed through the contractions.  Had I known what I know now, I would have gotten out of that bed and walked around as much as I could to just keep things going.  Instead, I sat in bed, breathing through every contraction, gripping my mom and husband’s hands until each one dissipated.  Then, the shaking set in….I was so frustrated because mentally I felt like I could power through this a bit more, yet I felt like my body was showing me that it couldn’t handle this anymore.  I waited until about 4:30 before calling for the anesthesiologist.

 

After the epidural was administered, we all relaxed a little, just watching the contractions ebb and flow on the computer screen.  By 7am, I was fully dilated and the doctor was paged.  I had no idea what to expect from here.  With Ben, I was in labor for over 18 hours and pushed for 2.5 hours.  I wondered if I was in for a marathon again.  The doctor arrived and asked if I wanted a mirror to watch the birth.  While I was petrified to do this during Ben’s birth, I felt much more confident this time around and agreed to roll in the mirror.  Well, 2 pushes in, Ryan’s little head slipped out and the third push delivered his beautiful body.  And I was able to watch the whole thing!

 

 

My doctor brought Ryan to me and laid him on my chest as his umbilical cord finished pulsating.  My stomach immediately grew warm as he peed all over me and we laughed that at least his ‘parts’ were in working order!  Within 20 minutes, my sweet one had latched on beautifully and we laid there for over an hour just gazing into one another’s eyes, memorizing each other’s face and scent. 

 

And as I held my brand new son, this overwhelming sense of love enveloped me.  It was as if I knew how much joy this incredible being was going to bring to our lives.  That fear that I had felt for the past 9 months… the one where I would be incapable of loving another child as much as I loved Ben… it just disappeared within minutes.  That guilt that I initially felt about depriving Ben of more time with just me and Jason flew out the window as I began to envision the two of them as brothers, sharing things only brothers get to share.

 

Six years later, I remember Ryan’s birth like it was yesterday.  I still love to hold him and memorize his face and scent, as I know his face will continue to change and get older.  My heart still melts when I watch Ryan and Ben act like loving brothers, for I know that a sibling is the greatest gift a parent can ever bestow on a child.  And, while I may not have consciously chosen to have my kids 15 months apart, I know deep down in my soul that we were meant to have our Ryan.

 

Happy birthday, beautiful boy!  We all love you so very much!

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What about My Freezer Stash of Breastmilk During a Power Outage?

As many breastfeeding moms prepare for Hurricane Sandy and her aftermath, we wanted to share a fantastic article written by our friend, Katy Linda of Stylin’ Momma.  Here’s all you need to know about what to do with your frozen breastmilk during a Hurricane, or any power outage for that matter. 

Our thoughts are with all of you on the East Coast who are bracing for this monstrous storm and hope Sandy is much weaker than expected.

 

Weathering a Storm with a Freezer Stash of Breastmilk

Reposted with permission by Katy Linda, IBCLC of Stylin’ Momma

As Hurricane Sandy approaches the east coast of the US, many moms are wondering, ‘What about my freezer stash?‘.  And with good reason.  There is concern about what this storm will do and how long people may be without power.  Many moms have worked hard to have frozen milk on hand for their babies, and the thought of losing that liquid gold is just too much to bear.

As many breastfeeding moms prepare for Hurricane Sandy and her aftermath, we wanted to share a fantastic article written by our friend, Katy Linda of Stylin’ Momma.  Here’s all you need to know about what to do with your frozen breastmilk during a Hurricane, or any power outage for that matter. 

Our thoughts are with all of you on the East Coast who are bracing for this monstrous storm and hope Sandy is much weaker than expected.

 

Weathering a Storm with a Freezer Stash of Breastmilk

Reposted with permission by Katy Linda, IBCLC of Stylin’ Momma

As Hurricane Sandy approaches the east coast of the US, many moms are wondering, ‘What about my freezer stash?‘.  And with good reason.  There is concern about what this storm will do and how long people may be without power.  Many moms have worked hard to have frozen milk on hand for their babies, and the thought of losing that liquid gold is just too much to bear.

So how long can you go without power and still save that precious breastmilk?  Let’s see…

We know that the safest place to store breastmilk is in a chest freezer or deep freezer at a temperature of 0 degrees Farenheight. ABM Protocol #8

We also know that a freezer generally stays frozen for 24-48 hours without power, especially if it is full. via USDA

So, we know off the bat that breastmilk frozen in a full chest freezer is absolutely safe for 48 hours!  Great news.  The best way to protect your milk is to store it in the center of the freezer, where temperatures are more stable. This will ensure it stays frozen as long as possible.

And what if the power is out longer?  Let’s see –

Breastmilk is still considered frozen if there are ice crystals in it or it is a slushy consistency. via HMBANA’s best practice, 2005.

Wow.  So even beyond 48 hours we can look for ice crystals to tell us the milk is still frozen. Wonderful news. But what do we do when the milk is thawed and there are no ice crystals left?

Take a look at this:

“The data generated by the authors support the contention that milk is relatively robust. Milk that has been left unrefrigerated for less than 8 hours, or placed in the refrigerator for a day, is safe to use and retains a good portion of its nutritional value. Moreover, it appears that unpasteurized milk that has been accidentally thawed remains safe to use provided it has not been left too long in an unthawed condition. Based on these data, it appears that unpasteurized milk that has thawed in the refrigerator for up to 8 hours may be safely refrozen. Moreover, this data would seem to support the use of frozen milk to which fresh milk has been added and then refrozen. This should allow for more convenient storage and for the salvage of milk that mothers might otherwise have been told to discard.

 Rechtman DJ, Lee ML and Berg H. Effect of environmental conditions on unpasteurized donor human milk. Breastfeeding Medicine. Spring, 2006;  1(1): 24-26.

So it looks like thawed milk CAN be refrozen if necessary.

Let’s keep in mind that breastmilk is a living fluid, and is full of live cells and active immune factors and enzymes which can be, and are, damaged in the freezing process.  The BEST way to have breastmilk is fresh.  That is when the nutritional content is at its highest.  The more we change the temperature the more we denature the proteins, and we lose some of those important qualities.  You might consider leaving out the milk that would be used in the next 24 hours, then re-freezing the rest.

*** Keep in mind that this is to be used for emergency situations, not on a regular basis.  Since you don’t pump in a laboratory you may want to make sure the milk passes the sniff test before feeding it to the baby.  Breastmilk that is bad will smell BAD and you will know.  If it smells fine, it likely is.

 

 

Some tips to maximize the length of time your milk will stay frozen & safe -

1. Store milk in the center of a full chest/deep freezer. To help fill the freezer you can fill plastic bags or containers with water and freeze them into ice.

2. Group bags of milk into plastic container or larger bags to avoid leaking in case of defrost.

3. Avoid opening the freezer, this will allow warm/room temperature air in and speed up the thaw process.

4. Dry Ice can be added to the freezer to keep milk frozen for extended periods of time – More info can be found here.

5. Feed your baby directly from the breast as often as possible during the power outage, and avoid using the frozen milk when proper heating isn’t possible.

Stay safe and warm, and enjoy some downtime with your little ones.

 

*** This article was first posted on Stylin' Momma

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Toddler Nursing and How it Helped Me Manage My Circus – Pt I.

Written by guest blogger, Andrea J. Blanco, IBCLC

When my first son was a baby, he absolutely hated car rides. On a trip to the bookstore, I came across Dr. Seuss’ “All Aboard the Circus McGurkus!.” I read that book to him every day and soon came to find the only thing to keep him calm during those car rides was my reciting lines from the book.

“The Circus McGurkus, the World’s Greatest Show. On the face of the Earth or wherever you go…” 

My son is seven now and I still remember most of the lines. So, when I asked a group of moms to give me one word to describe toddler nursing in preparation for this post, imagine my delight in realizing their answers could fit right into our beloved book:

“Amazing. Demanding. A Haven. Stupendous.”

“Loving. Convenient. Tantrum Fixer. Endless.”

Ok, so maybe no one said “stupendous”. But, you get the idea.

Written by guest blogger, Andrea J. Blanco, IBCLC

When my first son was a baby, he absolutely hated car rides. On a trip to the bookstore, I came across Dr. Seuss’ “All Aboard the Circus McGurkus!.” I read that book to him every day and soon came to find the only thing to keep him calm during those car rides was my reciting lines from the book.

“The Circus McGurkus, the World’s Greatest Show. On the face of the Earth or wherever you go…” 

My son is seven now and I still remember most of the lines. So, when I asked a group of moms to give me one word to describe toddler nursing in preparation for this post, imagine my delight in realizing their answers could fit right into our beloved book:

“Amazing. Demanding. A Haven. Stupendous.”

“Loving. Convenient. Tantrum Fixer. Endless.”

Ok, so maybe no one said “stupendous”. But, you get the idea.

If you are the mom of a newborn, the mere thought of nursing a toddler probably seems really daunting, and my advice to you is the same advice I give to my clients: Take it one day at a time. Nursing isn’t a race and the person who goes the longest doesn’t win or lose. This is about your personal journey with YOUR baby and doing anything other than taking it day by day is rushing an already hurried adventure.

My son was ten months old when I first realized maybe I would nurse him past a year. I remember thinking there probably wasn’t going to be some alarm that went off to tell him (or me) that he was supposed to be finished with nursing because it was his 1st birthday. I remember feeling like maybe, in my heart of hearts, we would continue. And we did, but not without some questions.

 

Is it “ok” to nurse into toddlerhood? 

There are myths out there that after a certain age (I’ve heard as young as 4 months), your breastmilk loses all value and *poof* you’re making water. This couldn’t be further from the truth. Yes, by the toddler years, your baby will be able to eat a wide variety of foods, but your breastmilk is still perfectly suited for his growing needs. In this second year of life, your breastmilk’s most important role takes center stage: continuing to support an immature immune system. It is the ultimate immune booster and is packed with tailor-made antibodies to help your toddler fight off all those germs she’s picking up at the playground (“Sweetie! What is that in your mouth?!”) and on all those playdates (“No, honey, that is NOT your water bottle.”).

Will I still be nursing every 2-3 hours?!

For one whole year, you have been at your baby’s beck and call. You, sweet mommy, are AMAZING. Don’t let those words, which fit perfectly in a Dr. Seuss story, scare you! While some mothers find it’s easier at times to nurse when the toddler wants it (remember, “Tantrum Fixer” is also up there), you are now living with a busy little bee who is newly mobile and has time for a lot of things, but sitting still and nursing isn’t top priority. Consider yourself her pit stop. Discovering the new world is about the most fun thing ever, but being so independent is also frightening. No, you won’t be nursing for hours on end like you did when your baby was younger. Instead you will be her home base. You will be what grounds her and tells her that it’s ok to go explore. And you will be that sense of reassurance in the same way you have been for the last year – by nursing.

 

Why would anyone want to nurse a toddler?

Aside from the very real health benefits, nursing a toddler is like being Mary Poppins. Let’s face it – we aren’t dealing with the most reasonable age group. They want what they want when they want it and still aren’t verbal enough or patient enough to understand why that can’t always be. They have teeth coming in, separation anxiety, bumps and bruises all over, difficulty understanding why you don’t understand what they’re saying and their veryadamant point of view, timeouts to protest, physics experiments to practice [by flinging things across the room]. Nothing softens those blows like curling up on Mommy’s lap and taking in the scents, sounds and feelings of the familiar: Love. Whether you are at home with your children or working outside the home, the reconnection that happens when you take a break with your little one is incredible. Sometimes, we don’t have 30 minutes to try and solve the problem (and often times, reasoning with a toddler no matter how much time we have just doesn’t work). But, just like Mary Poppins, we too have a magic potion we’re able to use to our advantage. Breastfeeding in the time of the Toddler Meltdown is often all it takes to defuse the situation.

The Technical Stuff. Did you know that, along with many other health agencies, the American Academy of Pediatrics recommends nursing for a minimum of 1 year and “continuation of breastfeeding for as long as mutually desired by mother and baby”? The World Health Organization recommends breastfeeding for “up to 2 years or beyond.” And, while it may not be common in the United States, considering the natural age of weaning worldwide is somewhere between 2.5 to 7 years, nursing into toddlerhood is really just a part of normal nursing.

In his book, Dr. Seuss introduces us to the Juggling Jot, “who can juggle some stuff you might think he could not”. Now when I read the original, longer version to my sons (If I Ran the Circus), I’ll be inclined to think that maybe, just maybe, he was really talking about the mom of a toddler as that Juggling Jot (he does, after all, juggle 22 question marks, 44 commas and also 1 dot). I, for one, am so thankful I was able to continue nursing past one year. Juggling my life, plus the life of my toddler and my family, would have been much more challenging had I stopped.

Come visit me again for Part II of Toddler Nursing, where we’ll talk about what to do when you have little support, how your milk supply will change while nursing a toddler, and how to handle tricky situations, like nursing a toddler in public.

 

Andrea Blanco is an International Board Certified Lactation Consultant at The Milk Collective Lactation Care, working with families in the Miami/Ft. Lauderdale area. She is the proud mom of 2 loving, spirited boys, who teach her humility, patience, humor, and the rules to more sports than she thought she’d need to know every day. When she’s not helping families achieve their breastfeeding goals, you can find her on the sidelines, at karate tournaments, or with her toes in the sand. She can also be found at themilkcollective.co, on Instagram @themilkcollective_ , facebook.com/themilkcollectivelactation or by email at: andrea@themilkcollective.co.

Have you enjoyed nursing your toddler?  

What advice do YOU have for other moms who are thinking about breastfeeding into toddlerhood?

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When a Toddler Bites While Nursing

Written by guest blogger, Leigh Anne O'Connor, IBCLC

Nursing a toddler is a confounding joy! He demands you sit. He does gymnastics and yoga while slurping your sweet nectar. Nursing is a great tool to calm a wild child or heal a skinned knee or a broken heart. These little people are growing rapidly. One day they are crawling, the next they are waddling toward the stairs or the dog food dish.  One day they mumble “mama” and “gaga” and then they learn the power of “NO!!” 

Another big change going on in the little body is the mouth – teeth are multiplying like bunnies in there. If a baby is latched correctly, his teeth are covered by his tongue.  Ah, but the older nursling has teeth on top and bottom! Yikes! As he is feeling those incisors pushing through his flesh nothing will sooth that sensation like biting down on something nice – like a breast!  Ouch! 

So, what is a mother to do?

Written by guest blogger, Leigh Anne O'Connor, IBCLC

Nursing a toddler is a confounding joy! He demands you sit. He does gymnastics and yoga while slurping your sweet nectar. Nursing is a great tool to calm a wild child or heal a skinned knee or a broken heart. These little people are growing rapidly. One day they are crawling, the next they are waddling toward the stairs or the dog food dish.  One day they mumble “mama” and “gaga” and then they learn the power of “NO!!” 

Another big change going on in the little body is the mouth – teeth are multiplying like bunnies in there. If a baby is latched correctly, his teeth are covered by his tongue.  Ah, but the older nursling has teeth on top and bottom! Yikes! As he is feeling those incisors pushing through his flesh nothing will sooth that sensation like biting down on something nice – like a breast!  Ouch! 

So, what is a mother to do?

Just as when a baby of any age bites the hand, (or breast that feeds him), the thing to do is not scream,  “ You little demon, you nearly amputated my breast!” Nor is it to cry out and run weeping into the streets or punt him across the room – though these ideas may make sense at the time. You take the little chomper off your breast and calmly, but firmly, tell him “No, you may not nurse if you bite.” Put him down off your lap and remain as emotionally neutral as you have it in you to be. This should neither be a game nor a horrifying experience. Biting is simply an unacceptable behavior.  After a brief period of being ignored he will either go on about his business or he may plead to have more sweet milk.  If you do offer the breast again tell him in no uncertain terms, “If you bite me again, you may not “nonnie” (or whatever word you use to nurse) again.” I do not mean forever – just at this time of the day.   A time or two like this should tame your little piranha.

Another reason toddlers bite is if they have a cold and cannot breathe so well while nursing. Some saline spray or nursing in a steamy bathroom or bedroom with a humidifier can help open up those little nasal passages.  

Some moms say that her baby bites if she is pregnant or if her milk supply is low (which can be caused by being pregnant). I cannot count how many women have called me to discuss their newly biting toddler. We run through the list of possibilities.

“Are you pregnant?” I ask.

I can almost see through the phone the look of surprised possibility on her face.

“Well, I don’t know. I don’t think so. Well, maybe. I gotta go now!”  

A couple days later my phone rings. “You were right! I am pregnant!” She had run to the drug store to buy a pregnancy test.

If your baby really chomps down hard you can hold him tight to you so that he is forced to open his mouth. Another approach is to put your finger in his mouth   between the teeth and break the latch.

Many moms think this is a time to wean. It can be scary. And, if you talk about it you can be led to believe that this is a sure sign to wean. It is just a stage that some – not all, I promise – toddlers go through.

As you negotiate your way, nursing an older baby in a world where most babies are weaned by their first birthday, you step lightly in your discussions with other mothers. Sometimes you find you are part of a secret society. You find these other mothers who nurse their toddlers and you laugh together at the antics and the sweetness of nursing a talking, opinionated human. You share your battle scars, which can sometimes be teeth marks on your areola.

 

Here are a few other great articles about how to deal with a toddler who bites while nursing:

Teething and Biting by Anne Smith, IBCLC

Nursing a Teething Toddler by LLLI

 

Here is some advice from our Facebook readers:

Marie: A firm no and gentle tap on his cheek usually disctracted him.  If he continued to bite, then we stopped nursing for a minute.  If he was done, he’d go and play.  If he still wanted to nurse, I would try again.  A third bite meant we were done.  Also, I would use phrases he understood like, ”Biting gives Mommy owies.  We do not bite.”

Chloe: We have one serious bite at 8 months.  It was at the zoo.  I had to unlatch him and leave him with a friend to go to the restroom and deal with the blood.  That was traumatic enough that he didn’t do it again.  Sometimes he gets a little wild while nursing if something strikes him as funny, but he calms right down if I unlatch him for a minute.

 

What tips do you have for a mother whose toddler is biting while nursing?

Leigh Anne O'Connor is Lactation Consultant in Private Practice in New York City, as well as a La Leche League Leader. Her blog is Mama Milk and Me.  She lives with her husband, Rob, and their three children, Phoebe, Chloe & Finn.

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Breastfeeding during Your Period: When Aunt Flow comes to visit

How many of you thought (or hoped) that breastfeeding was going to keep your period away forever (or at least for the time you were breastfeeding???)  I know I definitely thought that would be the case.  Boy was I surprised when my dear old friend (cue sarcasm) came to visit 5 months after my son was born.  And I was even more surprised when she didn’t show back up after her second visit….yep, apparently you can get pregnant while breastfeeding as well!

So, what’s the deal with breastfeeding during your period and how can you keep the crimson wave away for as long as possible?

When will my period return while breastfeeding?

Unfortunately, there is not a definitive answer to that question.  Breastfeeding will definitely suppress your period for a while.  Some moms may not menstruate for months or years while breastfeeding and other women may start their periods after a few weeks or months. 

Here are a few factors that determine when your period will return:

How many of you thought (or hoped) that breastfeeding was going to keep your period away forever (or at least for the time you were breastfeeding???)  I know I definitely thought that would be the case.  Boy was I surprised when my dear old friend (cue sarcasm) came to visit 5 months after my son was born.  And I was even more surprised when she didn’t show back up after her second visit….yep, apparently you can get pregnant while breastfeeding as well!

So, what’s the deal with breastfeeding during your period and how can you keep the crimson wave away for as long as possible?

When will my period return while breastfeeding?

Unfortunately, there is not a definitive answer to that question.  Breastfeeding will definitely suppress your period for a while.  Some moms may not menstruate for months or years while breastfeeding and other women may start their periods after a few weeks or months. 

Here are a few factors that determine when your period will return:

  • How often your baby nurses

  • How often your baby receives a supplement (other than your milk) in a bottle

  • If your baby use a pacifier

  • How long your baby is sleeping at night

  • If your baby eats solids

  • Your own body chemistry

Essentially, it comes down to this… the more time your baby is at breast, both during the day and during the night, the longer your period might be delayed.  My son was sleeping for about 8 hours a night at 5 months and was using a pacifier, which I think contributed to the early return of my period.  My sister, on the other hand, never used a bottle or pacifier, nursed her son until he was almost 3, and breastfed a few times a night up until he weaned.  Her period didn’t return for over 2 years.  This was nature’s way of holding off conception for my sister for a while.  In my case, nature thought my little guy was old enough to have another sibling, so bring on the period.

 

Will breastfeeding be different when I have my period?

Some women don’t notice much of a difference in their breastfeeding while they have their period.  Other women may notice some changes, such as:

  • Nipple tenderness during ovulation and menstruation

  • Temporary drop in milk supply the few days prior to getting your period and for a few days during.

  • Baby wanting to feed more frequently, due to the temporary dip in milk supply

  • Baby wanting to feed less, as your baby may detect a slight change in taste of your milk during this time.

These types of changes are all temporary and are related to a fluctuation in hormone levels.  A few days into your period, you should feel like your ‘normal’ breastfeeding relationship and supply have returned.

 

 

What can I do to compensate for this temporary dip in milk supply?

  • Let your baby nurse as often as he/she wants to (it may seem like a temporary growth spurt)

  • Start taking a daily magnesium glycinate supplement (120-240mg/night) to help your body detox excess estrogen during fluctuations during your cycle.

  • Increase your iron during your period with iron-rich foods (like meat, green leafy vegetables, and beans) or with a supplement, like Floradix or Green Super Foods

  • Add a few milk-increasing herbs (galactagogues) to your routine

(*** disclaimer: always speak with a healthcare provider before taking supplements or herbs)

 

We asked our Facebook friends how they deal with the temporary dip in their supplies and here is what they had to say:

Monica: Since my first cycle, I add an extra pumping session while at work daily.  On weekends I nurse on demand and notice that my daughter wants to nurse more often just before and during my period. 

Ariel: I up my intake of iron-rich foods, lactation cookies, and letting baby cluster feed.

Amanda: oatmeal, water, legumes, and yoga!

 

Do you notice a dip in your supply when you have your period? 

How do you deal with it?

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